I married in July of 1996 after looking for a husband for three years. One of my main drives to marry was to have children, and my husband was also very eager to have children. I figured we would be blessed with a pregnancy shortly after we married, that is what everyone thought...
It was a year and a half later, still no pregnancy, that we finally decided to go see a doctor to find out what was wrong. By this time I knew something was definitely wrong, and I knew I had to get something done. I had already checked out books, was able to chart my basal body temperature, I knew there were times when I ovulated properly and some times I didn't, I learned how to check my cervix position as well as cervical mucus. I also read up on common infertility problems and diagnosed myself with endometriosis, signs such as painful relations and painful menstrual cycles gave it away. My doctor was extremely happy that I was reading on the topic, it made things easier for both of us, the work finally began.
The normal checkup that usually occurs with a GYN was the easiest part of testing. No book could have prepared me for the pain I endured during my first HSG. While the books called it "minor discomfort" I would describe it as more of piercing a sword through my uterus. The injection of the dye is not so bad at all, but the clamping of the cervix should give an idea of pain. I have found though, since we move a lot the doctors changed, that the pain involved with HSG will vary from each doctor. Dr. Taylor, who was my second doctor, was much easier to take during the HSG. I was not hollering in pain, but was able to discuss what we saw on the monitor. Hence, the pain that I felt the first time around is not going to happen to everyone.
What I found out from my first HSG was that there was some blockage of my tubes. This took me to the final stage of diagnosis, laparoscopy, or the band aid surgery. This is when I was diagnosed with Stage 2 endometriosis. I opted to have major surgery to take care of my blocked tubes and adhesions. I now have one very good tube on my right side, my left is not so good but not impossible to work with. But as they say you only need one…
It was my third month of Clomid along with the active ingredient of cough syrup, a drug called called Guaifenesin. What this does is help liquefy the cervical mucus, which normally should be very thin and easy for the sperm to penetrate during ovulation (clomid can contribute to a change in cervical mucus). Many women take their own concoctions of cough syrup, but for Muslims we must watch the alcohol content in such products. I would personally prefer taking a few small pills a few times a day from the 10th day of my cycle until ovulation instead of gulping down cough syrup :). Being on clomid it is not unusual when it changes your monthly cycle, the flow, texture, being late, and a decrease or increase in the amount of days. So at about cycle day 40 when my cycle had yet to show up and along with a "over the counter" pregnancy test (results negative) my doctor prescribed a drug that would cause my cycle to come, unwilling as it was. This drug will usually take a week to take the medication and 10 days after that you should have your cycle. Imagine my annoyance when two weeks latter still my "little friend" was a no show.
I went to the doctor’s office and had some blood work done, I thought just nerves. Well I blew my doctor away when I wound up pregnant, not only with one but twins. Oh yes, if I am to do it... I will always opt to overdo it :). They were born in January of 1999, I went full term and both weighed in at 6 lbs 10 oz each.
A year later I decided that I wanted to have another child, since I plan on homeschooling during their younger years I wanted to have children close in age. I again took clomid for ovulation, while some woman will not need to go back to ovulation drugs some will. I also took hytuss to help the cervical mucus, I did not want to change anything that worked the first time around.
After one cycle on clomid I became pregnant Alhamdulillah (praise is due to Allah), we are expecting a girl in Nov 2000 inshallah.
Being an avid reader and internet junky, I decided to search for other women in my situation. Not only ones that I can relate to on an "infertile level" but also the ones with which I can share a common foundation of Islaam. What I found was a stigma on women who can't bear children right after marriage and no one freely discusses this issue.
As Allah says, ‘He leaves whom He wills barren,’ so we know that it can happen to any couple. The lack of Islamic resources on the topic is beyond irritating, and it was then that I decided the web would be a good place to get us dealing with this issue. With the help of my dear sister Rabea... here we are. I pray that everyone finds this informative, and we are able to fight against ignorant type casts of barren couples, become more sensitive to the issue, and stop down-grading women whom Allaah has chosen to be barren or men for that matter.