A husband disciplining his wife according to Islamic ettiquette, governing himself by specific and strict refined regulations of Islamic Law, is only for a wives who are recalcitrant and have evil and unjustified conduct towards their husbands. This disciplinary action must be done by one who fears Allah and wishes to keep marital matters private; in no way does Islaam sanction domestic violence. Sisters should also fear Allah and maturely deal with and change any recalcitrance and refractoriness on their part.
There is a huge difference between this disciplinary measure and abuse perpetrated by unrefined, ignorant and hot-headed individuals. Abuse must stop and the appropriate measures to prevent it must be taken. It is noteworthy to mention that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) never beat any of his wives. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “From among the believers are those who have the kindest disposition and are the kindest to their families- such are those who show the most perfect faith. The best among them are those who are kindest to their wives.” [Bukhaari and Muslim]