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My friends when things become unbearable, turn to Allah.

Ibn al-Jawzi said:

“Something was causing me a great deal of grief and distress, and I started to think long and hard about how to get out of this situation by any means, but I could not find any way out. Then I came across this verse:

“… And whosoever fears Allah and keeps his duty to Him, He will make a way for him to get out [ of every difficulty].” (Surah Talaq, 65:2)

I realized that Taqwa (piety, fearing Allah) is the way out of every kind of grief and distress. As soon as I followed the path of Taqwa, I found the way out.” 

Taqwa is the way that leads to everything good, for calamity happens only as the result of sin and it can only be lifted through repentance. Sadness, grief and worry are punishments for sins that we have committed, by falling short in our prayers, or backbiting about someone, or taking sin lightly, or committing Haraam actions. Whoever disobeys Allah has to pay the price for that shortcoming. Staying away from the guidance of Allah only brings misery and deprives one from His blessings. It will turn our knowledge, beauty, strength and intelligence into a calamity and loss.

Turning to Allah requires a person to renew himself, reorganize his life, develop a better relationship with Allah, do better deeds and recite this Dua often:

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I was reading  some quotes by Helen Keller and this one particular quote caught my attention:

"A happy life consists not in the absence, but in the mastery of hardships." (The Simplest Way to be Happy 1933)

Don't we see that Allaah swt honoured us through the test He (swt) gave us to increase our reward by giving us an opportunity to practice patience, to determinedly persevere in serving Him (swt) with taqwaa (fearing Allaah swt), and to smile in gratitude to Him (swt) that the test is not any worse, that He (swt) helped us through this test?

It may be this test and nothing less than this that leads to you being honoured by ar-Rahmaan in your grave, on the Day of Judgement, in Jannatul Firdaus...it may be this test that leads also to you becoming more aware of your faith, of you turning back to Allaah (swt), of reading the Qur'aan (His swt's words) and loving the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him)...and it is through this remembrance of Allaah (swt) will our hearts ultimately find true happiness and deep contentment.  How many times in our life did we have it all or do we know of those who "have it all" yet they're hearts are unsettled...they aren't content...they feel an emptiness...and yet Allaah (swt) places us in a test and by His Mercy blesses us with the opportunity to remember Him  and we become genuinely happy.

Allaah (swt) may seem be taking something from us...someone we love, our health, our wealth, our businesses...but perhaps so that this test leads us to arrive at the path of true happiness, where our hearts reach contentment and rest and ultimate happiness through the remembrance of Allaah (swt).

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Allah the Almighty says, which means: "And it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allah knows but you do not know." (AI-Baqarah, 2:216)

In this Qur'anic Verse, there are several judgments, meanings and benefits for the servant - if the servant knows that misfortune can produce a desirable thing, and that the desirable thing can produce a misfortune, he would not feel secure against the harm that can come from delight, and he would not lose hope of delight to come from harm, for he does not know the outcomes of things. Verily, it is Allah Who knows about that which the servant does not know, and in this context the following issues must be noted:

Nothing is more beneficial for him than abiding by the judgments of Allah, even if it is difficult for him at the beginning, because all its outcomes are good, delightful, and pleasurable. In the same way, nothing is more harmful for him than committing what is forbidden, even if he loves it. All its outcomes are pain, grief, evil and misfortune.

Furthermore, the mind bears little pain in comparison to the great pleasure and abundant good that it will experience, and likewise man is expected to avoid little in exchange for great rewards and preventing great pain and long term evil.

In this way, we can see that the perception of the ignorant does not go beyond the basics of life; his perception does not reach the goals, but the intelligent person always keeps his eye on the goals behind his actions in life.

The intelligent person perceives forbidden things like delicious food, which contain fatal poison. Whenever its pleasure arouses his interest, the reality of the poison would push him away from it. Also, he perceives the orders of Allah as bitter medicine that leads to good health and recovery.

Whenever its bitterness urges him not to take it, the reality of its usefulness leads him to comply. This requires knowledge that is more than the rudiments of the religion in order to understand the essential goals. It also requires strong patience to adjust oneself to it, in order to bear the difficulties that will be encountered for the sake of the goal. So if he loses certainty and patience, it would be difficult to achieve the goal, and on the other hand if his certainty and patience is strong, every difficulty would be rendered easy for him for the sake of permanent good and eternal pleasure.

There are other meanings of this verse. It also requires the servant to leave all his affairs in the Hands of the One Who knows the outcomes of all things, and to be pleased with whatever He chooses for him.

Also, the meanings of the verse include the fact that he should not propose or choose for his Lord, and should not ask Him for that which he has no knowledge of, for his harm and ruin may be in it and yet he does not know. He should simply ask his Lord to choose good for him and make him pleased with His choice, for that indeed would be the best ending. Also when he  leaves all his affairs to his Lord, and is satisfied with His choice for him, Allah will support him by providing him with ability, determination and patience. He, the Almighty would also keep him away from the evil that the servant would have encountered if he had chosen for himself. He would show him some of the positive outcomes of His Choice, which he would not have attained if he had chosen for himself.

Such thinking relieves him of the burdens of trying to choose for himself as Allah frees his heart from estimations and arrangements, which fluctuate in difficulty. And in spite of this, the servant would always be surrounded by what was initially preordained for him. If he is pleased with the Choice of Allah, the preordainment would grant him what is praiseworthy, worthy of thanks and worthy of Allah's Mercy. Otherwise, the preordainment would incur on him all that is dispraised and unworthy of Allah's Mercy, because it was his own choice. When he truly leaves his affairs to Allah and truly becomes pleased with that, he would be surrounded by kindness and care in the preordainment, and he would be under the care and kindness of Allah. His Kindness protects him from that which he fears and His Care makes it easy for him to bear that which He preordained.

Therefore, there is nothing more beneficial for him than submission.

Source: AL-FAWAAID, A Collection of Wise Sayings.

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Hudhayfah (may Allah be pleased with him) said,

“Whenever the matter became serious the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) would pray.” (Collected by Abu Dawud (1319) and others.)

Benefits that derived from this narration

Muhammad Abdur Rauf Al-Manawee (may Allah have mercy on him) commented on this narration. He wrote that, ”Whenever the matter became serious,” means,

(The Prophet, peace be upon him, did such) if the Prophet was attacked by surprise, on the verge of being subdued or due to an important matter which caused him to be worried or feel sad.

“He (peace and blessings be upon him) would pray.”

Means (that) he’d pray because prayer helps against the removal of all heavy blows, disasters and misfortunes. Through prayer one is seeking the assistance of the Creator who allowed it to happen. Prayer is a means to draw nearer to Allah and whoever resorts to prayer to his Lord will be protected and averted from all evil. [Faydul Qadir # 6641]

Al-Mulla Ali Qari 1014H (may Allah have mercy on him) said,

“The meaning for this Hadeeth is derived from the verse, “Seek help in patience and prayer.” (Al-Baqarah 45.) [ Sharh Musnad Abu Haneefah page 342 printed by Darul Kutubul Ilmeeyah Beriut Lebanon.]

Shaykh Muhammad ibn Salih Al-Uthaymeen (may Allah grant him the Highest Paradise) commented on this issue in his Tafseer of Suratul Baqarah. He said,

“The excellence of prayer is that it’s one of the things a person can seek assistance in for all matters and worldly affairs. Allah mentioned prayer and we believe with certainty that this speech is the truth. It’s been reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) would pray whenever the matter became serious. This is also supported by the Prophet’s action during the Battle of Badr. He prayed in the shade and appealed to his Lord for help. [Tafseerul Quran Al-Kareem Al-Fateehah-Baqarah vol 1 page 163-164]

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If one takes a just and unbiased look at the current condition of mankind in general and the Muslims in particular, in an era where technology is at its most advanced and civilization is at its most developed in economic, medical, military and informational terms, they will find that all this worldly knowledge, information and development is inherently deficient and inept because it cannot produce people who realises the reason for his creation.

There is no doubt that this is a fact, otherwise, how can one explain the spread of ignorance and illiteracy in the era of knowledge and technology? Why is there so much poverty at a time of abundant resources? Why is unemployment overwhelming in an era of mass production and manufacturing? Why do some international researchers who specialise in community affairs call this era an era of grief and depression after they called the previous one an era of anxiety? We do not need many evidences to prove that we are suffering from the spread of this phenomenon, the phenomenon of grief and depression.

This is the destructive problem of our time and it is the most widespread amongst all the psychological diseases in the world. It is continually on the increase. An accurate International survey affirms that ten percent of the world's population suffers from it, including the Muslim countries, which means that hundreds of millions of people are living through this bitter reality. Moreover, there is proof that this phenomenon is starting at a younger age as time goes by and that it affects twice as many females as males. This has resulted from the fact that women are not practicing their natural role in the community due to them shouldering responsibilities which they were forced to, leading them to leave the role of raising their children to maids and day care centres.

The number of suicides resulting from grief and depression has exceeded eight hundred thousand annually, and this is beside the fact that eighty percent of those who suffer from it do not see doctors in order to report or solve the problem. This is not a new phenomenon and its causes are not mysterious, rather it is the natural and expected result when people become obsessed by gathering and collecting worldly belongings and when people’s concerns become purely materialistic. Therefore, this problem differs from one country or community to another and is dependent on the weakness of people’s belief in Allaah, His angels, His Books, His Messengers, The Last Day and the divine decree. This is in addition to people’s behaviour and the degree of security, justice and love between the people.

This phenomenon has interested scholars of various disciplines, medical doctors, writers and journalists who have studied and addressed this problem. In many cases the articles written have been of little benefit, and as much as people have addressed this problem, no one seems to have approached it correctly. The only correct and acceptable way of curing and solving this problem is if its diagnosis is founded on scientific treatment which is based on authentic laboratory tests and reports conducted by trustworthy specialists who apply the principles of Islaam to all their tests and stay away from the purely materialistic bias which fails to attach any value to the spiritual side of the problem.

Grief is a something natural that humans feel due to their common problems, it is when it increases and overwhelms a person that it becomes what is known as depression. This is a condition that is considered to be at the highest level of grief and results in a person becoming controlled and dominated by their inner misery, the result of which is despair and loss of happiness. It is usually accompanied with headaches, bone problems, ulcers and other symptoms; it also makes a person lose their taste of joy and happiness. The results of depression include laziness, loss of energy and hatred of life which makes some people feel that suicide is the only solution. Imaam Ibn Al-Qayyim, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said,

"Four things destroy the body: anxiety, grief, hunger and sleeping late."

Applying medical treatment with a religious foundation, extracted from the Book of Allaah and the Sunnah of the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) is vital because it is the most perfect and safest form of treatment, especially when one compares this to the hundreds of medications and tranquilizers which have flooded the market and which the human body becomes addicted to, thereby descending into a worse and more serious condition than depression.

Some medical reports state that swimming and frequently doing house work is a solution for depression, but it is ludicrous to imagine that depressed people will always remain in swimming pools or be constantly doing housework. On the other hand, it is accepted that a person can easily be remembering Allaah, glorifying him and seeking His forgiveness at all times, whether he is standing, sitting or lying down. This is how Allaah described the people of understanding when He says that which translates as, “[Those] Who remember Allaah while standing or sitting or [lying] on their sides and give thought to the creation of the heavens and the earth, [saying], 'Our Lord! You did not create this aimlessly; exalted are You [above such a thing]; then protect us from the punishment of the Fire'”. (Aal ‘Imraan: 190-191). Therefore, we can see the importance of spiritual treatment to these problems, although there is no doubt that medication is also necessary, but the point is that we must not ignore the spiritual treatments that exist for these problems. We shall concentrate on the some of the reasons why depression exists which have been specifically addressed by Islaam and dispraised and warned against it in many verses of the Qur’aan aswell as in various Ahaadeeth.

In many Qur'aanic verses and Ahaadeeth it is mentioned that the heart which is heedless of the remembrance of Allaah, which is reflected by the heedlessness of the tongue is an indication of grief and misery for the person who is afflicted by this. Allaah says that which translates as, “And whoever turns away from My remembrance – Indeed, he will have a depressed [i.e., difficult] life, and We will gather [i.e., raise] him on the Day of Resurrection blind.” (Taa Haa: 124).

Also, it is also mentioned in the Sunnah that sins lead to depression, as stated in the book of Imaam Ahmad, may Allaah have mercy upon him, that the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said, “If a slave’s sins increase and he does not have enough good deeds which would wipe these out, then Allaah will afflict him with grief and sorrow in order to wipe them out”.

Being anxious and concerned about the future and the lack of belief in divine decree and pre-destination is another cause of this problem. Some people worry about what the future holds for them and fear being incapable of dealing with problems, disasters and calamities, if and when they arrive. One finds that such people are in such a frenzy at times of tribulation that if they could find refuge in a cave or other remote and concealed place, they would rush like mad to get to it.

Bad dreams caused by Satan, who instils sorrow in a person, also play an important role the cause of depression. The Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) informed us that Satan comes to people as they sleep and makes them see things which results in them feeling grief and sorrow. This is why we see many people who suffer from depression not being able to sleep properly.
Other reasons that lead to depression are debts which a person cannot repay, cowardliness at the time of fear and stinginess whilst aggressively collecting wealth.

The proof that debts cause grief and anxiety lies in the Hadeeth where the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) went into the mosque one day and found Abu Umaamah, may Allaah be pleased with him, and said, “O Abu Umaamah! Why do I see you sitting in the mosque when it is not prayer time?” Abu Umaamah, may Allaah be pleased with him, replied, "It is due to anxiety and grief, which resulted from debts that I owe." So the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said, “Shall I teach words which will take away your grief and by which Allaah will help you repay your debts, if you were to say them?” Abu Umaamah, may Allaah be pleased with him replied, "Yes! O Messenger of Allaah." Thereupon, the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said, “Every morning and every evening say, O Allah! I seek refuge in you from anxiety and grief, weakness and laziness, miserliness and cowardliness, the burden of debts and from being over powered by men." After this, Abu Umaamah, may Allaah be pleased with him, commented that, "I did this and Allaah relieved my sorrow and anxiety and helped me repay my debts."

These were some reasons behind depression, and through these one can clearly see the connection between depression and straying away from the guidance and the path of Allaah, committing that which Islaam has prohibited, and being attached to worldly matters. Allaah says that which translates as, “So whoever Allaah wants to guide – He expands his breast to [contain] Islaam; and whoever He wants to misguide – He makes his breast tight and constricted as though he were climbing into the sky. Thus does Allaah place defilement upon those who do not believe.” (Al-An’aam: 125).

In order to address this topic in a comprehensive manner we must briefly point out some of the best ways of curing this problem, based on the Islamic texts in addition to the testimony of eminent and specialised medical doctors:

*The first and most important is the obligation of the Muslim nation of performing Jihaad for the sake of Allaah, propagating it and inviting people to perform it, and warning against being inclined towards this life and its pleasures. This is the way to a prosperous and tranquil heart, and a means of getting rid of grief and misery. The Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said, “When people become stingy, deal with ‘Eenah (a form of Ribaa), follow their cattle and become satisfied with agriculture (i.e., become attached to agriculture and commerce) then Allaah will afflict them with humiliation until they return to their religion”. The Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) also said, “Perform Jihaad because it is one of the gates that lead to Paradise, and a way through which Allaah relieves people from anxiety and grief”.

*The correct understanding and belief in divine decree and pre-destiny is another way to treat this problem. When a person believes that there was no way that he could have escaped whatever befell him and that all matters are in the Hands of Allaah, including ones provisions and death, and that no one will die until he consumes all his decreed provision and until he lives for the whole amount of time that was given to him, then he will definitely rely on Allaah completely without any worry or grief and will face all his problems with strength and resolution. Also, if people acknowledge that whatever Allaah has decreed resulted from His perfect wisdom, then they will be content with whatever He decrees. One who is discontent will become an easy victim for grief, disease and following base desires. Al-Hasan, may Allaah have mercy upon him, was asked how he attained his good manners, he replied,

"From being content with the decree of Allaah".

Abu Haatim, may Allaah have mercy upon him, reported that some of the Salaf said regarding being content,

"There is no rank higher or mightier than being content. It is the peak of loving Allaah".

This is exactly why Prophet Zakiryaa, peace be upon him, supplicated to Allaah to grant this to his son, as Allaah says that which translates as, “…And make him, my Lord, pleasing [to You]." (Maryam: 6). Contentment can only be established when the slave has firmly in his mind the conviction that whatever Allaah decrees results from His wisdom. Allaah provides and deprives for a wise reason, and this is the only thing that will make a person feel at ease during times of hardships. This also applies during times of prosperity, as Allaah informs us in the Qur’aan about Prophet Sulaymaan, peace be upon him, with that which translates as, “…'This is from the favour of my Lord to test me whether I will be grateful or ungrateful. And whoever is grateful – his gratitude is only for the [benefit of] himself. And whoever is ungrateful – then indeed, my Lord is free of need and Generous.' (An-Naml: 40). This is also evident in the saying of the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) when his son Ibraaheem died, “The eyes cry tears, and the heart becomes sad, but we will not say that which will bring the wrath of our Lord. If it was not a true promise, and that we will meet in an appointed time, and that the last will eventually follow (die) after the first, then we would have cried hard for your death (O Ibraaheem). Indeed we are saddened by your departure.” (Al-Bayhaqi & Ibn Maajah). By saying this, the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) meant that had he not known that there was a wisdom from Allaah behind taking his son, he would have extremely been saddened.

*Extra prostration and glorification of Allaah and worship in general takes away grief. Allaah says that which translates as, “…And We already know that your breast is constrained by what they say. So exalt [Allaah] with praise of your Lord and be of those who prostrate [to Him]. And worship your Lord until there comes to you the certainty [i.e., death].” (Al-Hijr: 97-99). Whenever the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) felt grief or worry, he would rush to prayer. The Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said, “Whoever continuously asks forgiveness from Allaah, then Allaah will make a way out for him from all his worries, and will provide him from means he never would have expected”.

*The dish of Talbeenah is another relief from grief and anxiety, as narrated by ‘Aa’ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her, that the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said, “Talbeenah relieves a person’s heart from anxiety and some of its grief.” (Bukhaari & Muslim). Talbeenah is a natural medicine which is prepared by boiling wheat or barley with either honey or milk, or both of them.

*The final cure is that which the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) advised us with when he said, “Allaah will relieve any slave who is afflicted with grief and anxiety from his anxiety and replace his grief with happiness if he says, 'O Allaah! I am Your servant, son of Your servant, son of Your maidservant, my forelock is in Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me is just. I ask You by every name belonging to You which You named Yourself with, or revealed in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge of the unseen with You, that You make the Qur’aan the life of my heart and the light of my chest, and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety. O Allaah! Teach me from it that which I am ignorant of and remind me with it that which I was made to forget; I ask You by Your mercy, for You are the Most Merciful, to grant me its recitation during the hours of night and day in the form which pleases You'” . The people asked, "O Prophet of Allaah! Should we learn (i.e., memorize) these words?' He (sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) replied, “Yes! Everyone who hears this should memorise it."

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.. Feeling down in the dumps, depressed, having the blues? These are just some of the terms used to describe a feeling of hopelessness and despair that can hit even the most optimistic of us at some point in our lives. While clinical depression requires proper professional treatment, the occasional feeling of sadness due to factors ranging from marital issues, economic difficulty to harassment and discrimination can be helped through some simple spiritual practices. Here are a couple that can help:

1. Look at those below you

The Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Whenever you see someone better than you in wealth, face or figure, you should look at someone who is inferior to you in these respects.” (Bukhari and Muslim).

If you are reading this article online, consider this: you are one of the lucky set of human beings on the planet who can afford a computer and internet connection or at least have access to one. The United Nations Development Program’s Human Development Report notes that there are still around 1 billion people living worldwide at the margins of survival on less than $1 a day, with 2.6 billion living on less than $2 a day. Also consider that in the Quran (14:7), Allaah says that if you are thankful to Him for what you have, He blesses you with more.

2. Serve your fellow human beings

One of the best ways by which to thank Allaah is to serve humanity, especially those who have less than you. Serving others is uplifting and rewarding. It helps us gain a better perspective on life’s challenges, making us realize how very often, our problems seem so small compared to the awesome difficulties others face. That’s why when the Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, and the Muslims were a small, poor and persecuted community, they used to give to the poor even more. They understood that when you are generous when you have less, you achieve the perspective of a winner. You focus on the bigger picture.

3. Read Surah Adh-Dhuhaa

According to one report, after the Prophet had begun receiving revelation from God, at one point a long period of time passed with no such communication from Allaah. As a result, the Makkans ridiculed the Prophet. That’s when this chapter was revealed (Quran 93: 1-11). The chapter is a beautiful reminder to us to see life in the greater scheme of things, to be grateful for what we have and to never give up striving for what is right. This chapter of the Quran can be considered a direct recipe from God for depression.

4. Turn to Allaah in all situations

Remember that nothing can harm you without the consent of Allaah, the Most High. While you must take care of yourself, rely on Allaah and know that He is always with you and only He can give you strength in this difficult time. Dear believer, remember that He will help you and that you can come out of this trying situation as a better person if you deal with it positively.

5. Remember Allaah’s Names

Allaah has many beautiful Names which describe His Attributes and Powers. These are reminders of His Love, Mercy, Forgiveness, Justice, Strength and much, much more. Supplicating to Allaah using these Names reminds us that Allaah has these attributes more than any other being and that we can and must rely on Him during good and bad times.

6. Say ‘Hasbun Allaahu wa Ni’ mal Wakeel'

This has been translated as “God suffices me and He is the best Guardian.” It is an excellent way of reminding us that whatever worries we have or problems we face, Allaah has the answer and cure to all of them and is the only One who can really do what is best for us.

7. Make sure that when you leave home...

...you read the following Du'aa (supplication),

"Bismillahi tawakkaltu ala Allaahi laa hawla wa laa quwwata illa billah."

(In the name of Allaah, I place my trust in Allaah, and there is no might nor power except with Allaah.)

8. Take your spiritual break from the world...

...five times a day. Taking a break away from your busy schedule and endless life activities by spending a few minutes to remember Allaah, the Almighty. This will help you reconnect with the Creator of the Universe, fortify your soul and strengthen your resolve to live a better life that is in tune with your faith and principles.

9. End your day on a good note

Shakespeare once wrote a play entitled “All’s well that ends well.” That’s good advice for dealing with depression too. End a day that may have been riddled with challenges and frustrations by making Wudhoo' (ablution) before going to bed, thinking of Allaah and the Prophet (peace be upon him) and by counting and consciously realizing the many countless blessings you have.

10. Stop Shaytan in his tracks

Shaytan is the source of many of our negative emotions. It’s his job to make us feel pessimistic and to despair of any good in our lives. When you feel these feelings coming on, stop him dead in his tracks. Say,

In this way, Allaah willing, you shall begin to see a significant change in your life.

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As people are content with the world, so should you be content with Allaah. As they are delighted by the world, so should you be delighted with Allaah. As they are intimate with their loved ones, so should you seek intimacy with Allaah. As they desire to know their kings and their leaders, and to draw near to them in order for honor and status to be conferred on them, so should you come to know Allaah and seek His love, this will lead to the utmost honor and distinction.

Said one of the zuhhåd (pious):

"I can never imagine that someone could hear about Paradise and Hellfire and can still waste an hour without performing any act of obedience to Allaah, such as remembrance, prayer, reciting Qur'aan or an act of charity and kindness.”

Someone said to him: "I weep profusely."

He replied:

“That you laugh while confessing your sin is better than weeping yet being puffed-up with pride because of your deeds. For the deeds of a conceited person will never rise above his head.”

The person then requested: "Please counsel me."

So he replied:

“Leave the world to those who hanker after it, as they leave the Afterlife to its seekers. And be in this world as the bee: it eats only good, produces only good, and when it rests upon a flower it neither ruins it nor deflowers it.”

Source: Al Fawaa'id, Ibn al Qayyim al Jawziyyah (rahimahullaah), Pg.187.

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The average human being in the developed world battles sadness and worry on a daily basis. While the majority of the world's population confront extreme poverty, famine, conflict and despair those of us privileged to lead relatively easy lives must tackle fear, stress, and anxiety. Why are those of us blessed with riches beyond compare immersed in loneliness and desperation? We are living in a time of confusion, we try as we might, yet gathering material possessions can do nothing to mend broken hearts, and shattered souls.

Now, more than at any other time in human kind's history, stress, anxiety, and psychological problems are taking a tremendous toll on the human condition. Religious beliefs should afford a sense of comfort however; it seems that 21st century man has lost the ability to connect to God. Pondering the meaning of life no longer overcomes a feeling of abandonment. This desire to acquire material possessions, which in some way validates our reason for being, has become the balm that soothes our troubled souls. Why is this so?

We have the best of everything readily available, yet the reality is we have nothing. Nothing that comforts the soul. Beautiful furnishings do not hold our hand in the darkest night. The latest entertainment centre does not wipe our tears or soothe our furrowed brow. Those of us living with pain and grief, or afflicted with hardship feel abandoned. We feel rudderless on an open sea. Huge waves threaten to engulf us at any given moment. Our desires and debts stand at the apex and loom over us, like great avenging angels, and we search for comfort in addictions and self-destructive behaviour.

How do we step away from the precipice? In Islam, the answer is remarkably simple. We turn back to our Creator. God knows what is best for His creation. He has complete knowledge of the human psyche. He knows of the pain, the despair, and the sadness. God is whom we are reaching for in the darkness. When we put God back on our agenda, the pain will subside.

"Verily, in the remembrance of God do hearts find rest." (Quran 13:28)

Islam is not a religion filled with empty rituals and hypercritical rules and regulations, although it can seem so if we forget just what our real purpose in life is. We were created to worship God, nothing more and nothing less. However, God, in His infinite mercy and wisdom did not abandon us to this world filled with trials and tribulations. He armed us with weapons. These weapons are more powerful than the arsenals of the great 21st century armies. God gave us the Qur'aan, and the authentic traditions of His Prophet Muhammad.

The Qur'aan is a book of guidance and the traditions of Prophet Muhammad explain that guidance. The religion of Islam is all about making and keeping a connection with God. This is how Islam deals with sadness and worry. When the wave is about to come crashing down or the world begins to spin out of control God is the one stable factor. The biggest mistake a believer can make is to separate the religious and material aspects of his or her life.

"God has promised those who believe (in the Oneness of God) and do deeds of righteousness, that for them there is forgiveness and a great reward (i.e. Paradise)." (Quran 5:9)

When we accept with full submission, that we are no more than slaves of God, put on this earth, to be tried, tested and tempted, life suddenly takes on a completely new meaning. We recognize that God is the one constant in our lives and we recognize that His promise is true. When we are overwhelmed by worry and sadness, relief comes from turning to God. If we live our lives according to His guidance, we gain the means and the ability to overcome any despair. Prophet Muhammad declared that all the affairs of a believer are good.

The Prophet (may Allah be pleased with him) said, "Indeed amazing are the affairs of a believer! They are all for his benefit. If he is granted ease then he is thankful, and this is good for him. And if he is afflicted with a hardship, he perseveres, and this is good for him."[1]

Islam has the answer to all the problems that afflict humankind. It asks us to look beyond the need for self-gratification, and further still, beyond the need to acquire possessions. Islam reminds us that this life is but a transient pause on the way to life everlasting. The life of this world is but a fleeting moment, sometimes overflowing with moments of great joy and happiness but at other times filled with sadness, sorrow, and despair. This is the nature of life, and this is the human condition.

We will examine guidance from the Qur'aan and the authentic traditions of Prophet Muhammad in an endeavor to discover just how Islam suggests that we deal with sadness and worry. There are three key points that will allow the believer to free himself from the shackles of 21st century life. They are patience, gratitude, and trust in God. In the Arabic language, sabr, shukr and tawwakul.

"And certainly, We shall test you with something of fear, hunger, loss of wealth, lives and fruits, but give glad tidings to the patient ones." (Quran 2:155)

"Therefore, remember Me (God) and I will remember you, and be grateful to Me (for My countless Favours on you) and never be ungrateful to Me." (Quran 2:152)

"If God helps you, none can overcome you; and if He forsakes you, who is there after Him that can help you? And in God (Alone) let believers put their trust." (Quran 3:160)

Happiness in this life and our salvation in the hereafter depend on patience

Sadness and worry are part of the human condition. Life is a series of moments. At the two extremes are joyful moments that make our hearts sing with gladness and dark moments that plunge us into sadness and worry. In between is real life; the highs, the lows, the mundane and boring, the sweetness, and light. It is in these times that the believer must try to establish a connection to God.

The believer must forge a bond that is unbreakable. When the joy of life fills our hearts and minds we must not forget that it is a blessing from God and equally when we are faced with sadness and worry we must realize that this too is from God, even though at first glance we may not see the blessing.

God is the Most Wise and the Most Just. Whatever condition we find ourselves in, and no matter what we are forced to confront, it is imperative that we open our eyes to the fact that God knows what is good for us. Though we shy away from facing our fears and worries, it may be that we hate a thing that is good for us and desire something that can only lead to ruin and damnation.

"...and it may be that you dislike a thing that is good for you and that you like a thing that is bad for you. God knows but you do not know." (Quran 2:216)

The life of this world was designed by our Creator to maximize our chances of living a blissful life in the Hereafter. When we face trials, they help us grow and mature into human beings who are able to function effortlessly in this transient world.

God has not abandoned us in face of the temptations and trials we face in this world, He has equipped us with potent weapons. Three of the most important are:

• Patience
• Gratefulness
• Trust

The great Islamic scholar of the 14th century CE, Ibnul Qayyim said that our happiness in this life and our salvation in the Hereafter depend on patience.

"Verily! I have rewarded them this Day for their patience; they are indeed the ones that are successful." (Quran 23:111)

"...to be firm or patient in pain or suffering, and adversity, and throughout all periods of panic. Such are the people of truth, the God fearing." (Quran 2:177)

The Arabic word for patience is sabr and it comes from a root word meaning to stop, detain, or refrain. Ibnul Qayyim explained[1] that having patience meant having the ability to stop ourselves from despairing, to refrain from complaining, and to control ourselves in times of sadness and worry. Prophet Muhammad's son in law Ali ibn Abu Talib defined patience as

"Seeking God's help".[2]

Whenever we are beset by sadness and worry our first reaction should always be turning to God. By recognizing His Greatness and Omnipotence, we begin to understand that God alone can ease our troubled souls. God Himself advised us to call on Him,
"And (all) the Most Beautiful Names belong to Allah, so call on Him by them, and leave the company of those who belie or deny (or utter impious speech against) His Names." (Quran 7:180)

Prophet Muhammad encouraged us to call on God by all of His most beautiful names. In his own supplications, he is known to have said, "Oh God, I ask you by every name that You have named yourself, or that You have revealed in Your book, or that You have taught any of Your creation, or that You have kept hidden in the unseen knowledge with Yourself."[3]

In times of sorrow and stress, contemplating the names of God can bring great relief. It can also help us focus on being calm and patient. It is important to understand that although the believer is encouraged not to thrash about in grief and anguish or to complain about the stresses and problems, he is allowed to turn to God and supplicate to Him and to ask Him for relief.

Human beings are frail. Our tears fall, our hearts break and the pain is sometimes almost unbearable. Even the Prophets, whose connection to God was unbreakable, felt their hearts constrict in fear or pain. They too turned their faces to God and begged for relief. However, their complaints were surrounded with pure patience and pure acceptance of whatever fate God had decreed.
When Prophet Jacob despaired of ever seeing his sons Joseph or Benjamin he turned to God, and the Quran tells us that he beseeched God for relief. Prophet Jacob knew that there was no point in raging against the world, he knew that God loves and protects those who are patient, "He said: `I only complain of my grief and sorrow to God, and I know from God that which you know not.'" (Quran 12:86)

Qur'aan also tells us that Prophet Job turned to God begging of His mercy. He was impoverished, stricken with disease, and he lost his family, friends, and livelihood yet he bore all this with patience and forbearance and he turned to God,

"And (remember) Job, when he cried to his Lord, `Verily, distress has seized me, and You are the Most Merciful of all those who show mercy.' So We answered his call, and We removed the distress that was on him, and We restored his family to him (that he had lost), and the like thereof along with them, as a mercy from Ourselves and a Reminder for all who worship Us (God)." (Quran 21: 83-84)

Patience means accepting what is beyond our control. In times of stress and anxiety, being able to surrender to the will of God is a relief beyond measure. This does not mean that we sit back and let life pass by. No! It means that we strive to please God in all aspects of our life, in our work and play, in our family life and in our personal endeavors.

However, when things don't go the way we planned or the way we wanted, even when it seems that fears and worries are pushing us under, we accept what God has decreed and continue to strive to please Him. Being patient is hard work; it does not always come naturally or easily. Prophet Muhammad, may God praise him, said, "Whoever tries to be patient then God will help him to be patient".[4]

It becomes easy for us to exercise patience when we realize that it is impossible to count all the blessings God has bestowed upon us. The air we breathe, the sunshine on our faces, the wind through our hair, the rain on the parched earth and the glorious Quran, God's words to us are all among the innumerable blessings of God upon us. Remembering God and contemplating His greatness is the key to patience, and patience is a key to Paradise everlasting, God's greatest blessing for the fragile creatures called humankind.

Gratitude - Give thanks every single day for His blessings upon you

As fragile human beings, we are often swamped by fears and anxiety. At times sadness and worry threaten to take over our lives. These emotions can become so consuming that we forget our primary purpose in life, which is to worship God. When pleasing God is at the centre of all our thoughts, actions and deeds, then sadness and worry can have no place in our lives.

Another way of overcoming sadness and worry is by being grateful to God for His countless blessings. God explains in the Qur'aan, that true worshippers are those who are grateful and give thanks.

"Therefore, remember Me (by praying, glorifying, etc.). I will remember you, and be grateful to Me (for My countless Favors on you) and never be ungrateful to Me." (Quran 2:152)

There are many ways to express gratitude. The first and foremost way is to worship God in the manner that He has prescribed. The Five Pillars of Islam[1] were ordained upon us by God and they guide us to worship Him easily. When we fulfill our obligations towards God, just how truly blessed we are becomes obvious.

When we bear witness that, there is no god worthy of worship but Allah and that Muhammad is His Final Messenger we are being grateful for being blessed with Islam. When a believer prostrates before God in quiet, joyful prayer, we are expressing gratitude. During the fast of Ramadhaan, we become thankful for food and water by realizing that God provides our sustenance. If a believer is able to make the pilgrimage to the House of God in Mecca, it is indeed a cause for thankfulness. The Hajj journey can be long, difficult, and expensive.

The believer also expresses gratitude by giving charity. Prophet Muhammad, may God praise him, advised his followers to give charity everyday to express gratitude to God for every single joint or faculty in his body.[2] Imam Ibn Rajab, a noted Islamic scholar of the 7th Islamic century said,

"Human beings are obligated to give thanks to God every single day for His blessings on them by performing acts of virtue and charity on a daily basis."

If we remember God by reading the Qur'aan and contemplating its meanings, we gain a greater understanding of the life of this world and the hereafter. Consequently, we begin to understand the transient nature of this life and the fact that even the trials and tribulations are blessings from God. God's wisdom and justice is inherent in even the direst situations.

How often have we heard people with debilitating diseases or terrible disabilities thank God for their conditions, or speak about pain and suffering bringing blessings and goodness into their lives? How often have we listened to others speak about horrific experiences and ordeals, yet continue to thank God?

In times of sadness and worry, when we are feeling alone and distressed, God is our only refuge. When sadness and worry become unbearable, when there is nothing left but, stress, fear, anxiety, and misery, we instinctively turn to God. We know His words are true, we know His promise is true!

"..if you are grateful, I will add more favors unto you." (Quran 14:7)

God knows the wisdom behind why good things happen to bad people, or why bad things happen to good people. In general, whatever causes us to turn to God is good and we should be grateful for it. In times of crisis, people are drawn closer to God, whereas in times of comfort we often forget from where the comfort originated. God is the Provider and He is the Most Generous. God wants to reward us with life everlasting and if pain and suffering can guarantee Paradise, then trials and tribulations are a blessing. Prophet Muhammad, may God praise him, said, "If God wants to do good to somebody, He afflicts him with trials."[3]

Prophet Muhammad also said, "No misfortune or disease befalls a Muslim, no worry or grief or harm or distress – not even a thorn that pricks him – but God will expiate for some of his sins because of that."[4] We are imperfect human beings. We can read these words, we can even understand the sentiment behind them, but acknowledging the wisdom behind every situation and being grateful for our trials is very difficult. It is much easier to fall into sadness and worry. However, God, the Most Merciful, gives us clear guidelines and promises two things, if we worship Him and follow His guidance we will be rewarded with Paradise and that with hardship comes ease.

"So verily, with hardship, there is ease." (Quran 94:5)

This verse is part of a chapter of the Quran revealed when difficulties in Prophet Muhammad's mission were weighing him down and causing him distress. The words of God comforted and reassured him just as they comfort us today. God reminds us that with hardship comes ease. Hardship is never absolute; it is always accompanied by ease. For that, we should be grateful. For that, we need to express our gratitude.

We must accept the trials, triumphs, and tribulations that are part of being alive. Each one of them, from the highest highs to the lowest lows is a blessing from God. A blessing designed uniquely for each individual person. When we are overcome by sadness or worry we must turn to God, strive to be patient and grateful and put our trust in God. For God is the most trustworthy. By trusting Him, we can overcome any moment of anxiety and conquer any sadness or worry that tries to creep into our lives.

_______________

References:

[1] Saheeh Muslim
[2] Ibn Qayyim al jawziyyah, 1997, Patience and gratitude, English translation, United Kingdom, Ta Ha Publishers.
[3] Ibid. P12
[4] Ahmad, classified Saheeh by Al Baniv.
[5] Ibn Qayyim al jawziyyah, 1997, Patience and gratitude, English translation, United Kingdom, Ta Ha Publishers. P15
[6] Testimony of faith, Prayer, Fasting in Ramadan, Compulsory charity, Pilgrimage.
[7] Saheeh Bukhari
[8] Saheeh Bukhari
[9] Ibid

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I have now spent nearly an eighth of my life in prison. Life in prison is a journey into the unknown. Unlike other journeys it is one of those things that you can never plan ahead for. You don’t plan to have a car accident. You don’t plan to get cancer. You don’t plan to die. And you don’t plan to go to prison. Prison is just one of the many tests that you must pass in order to succeed in life.

The Prophet (saw) said, “There is some magic in words.” Tyrants use the magic in words to control people’s thoughts and deeds by making evil appear acceptable to them. So kidnap is known as “arrest”, brutality becomes “reasonable force” and torture is nothing more than “enhanced interrogation.” When an innocent man is kidnapped from his home by bearded Arab gunmen and locked indefinitely in a room he is a “hostage.” But when an innocent man is kidnapped from his home by uniformed white gunmen and locked indefinitely in a room he is a “terrorist.” The world causes uproar over the former but is silent over the latter.

“In the end we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends,”

observed Martin Luther King.

Fear is a disease that consumes the soul of the one who embraces it. Man’s total capacity to fear is fixed: the more he fears one thing the less he fears another. People fear standing up to a tyrant because they are afraid of some harm that he ‘may’ cause them, even though that harm is limited to the life of this world. Such people have little or no fear for any harm that Allah will cause them in the Hereafter.

However, if these same people were to fear the Day when they shall return to stand before the Lord of the Worlds, they would not fear any tyrant on the face of the Earth. “Do they fear them? Allah is more worthy for you to fear if you are indeed believers.” (Quran 9:13)

We survive in life by wearing a variety of faces that disguise our true inner selves. We have one face for our families, a face for our friends, a face for our colleagues, and a face for strangers. Since we are always switching between faces others hardly get to see who we really are. Sometimes we ourselves forget who we are. The harsh reality of prison life relentlessly files away at your external faces and personae to reveal the true you. There are no secrets in prison. Sincerity, hypocrisy, bravery, cowardice, good, evil – all are laid bare. Prison brings out the best, and worst, in people.

Prisoners undergo such a concentrated experience that they develop intensely deep personalities. We interact with each other heart-to-heart, not face-to-face. Our conversations frequently revolve around hope. No man, let alone a prisoner, can live without hope: hope that there is indeed a dawn at the end of this long, dark night. What else do you say to a man facing life in prison?

People are like “metals”, according to one narration of the Prophet Muhammad (saw). Some people are like a cheap bracelet plated in gold: the smallest crisis files away the fake gold to reveal the cheap metal underneath. Others are like a gold bracelet covered in rust: hardship rubs away the rust to bring out the gold below to the surface. And a third type are solid gold, inside and out: calamity just polishes the gold so it sparkles from near and far.

During the last four years I have personally witnessed the worst of men turn into the best of men. I have seen gangsters, drug barons, armed robbers and murderers, of all faiths and races, convert to Islam in prison. I have always been inspired by converts since every conversion is a miracle, but seeing a hardened criminal accept Islam is something else. Only the true religion is able to cause genuine, lasting change in an individual in a short space of time.

The first word revealed in the Quran was “Read!” There is no life without reading. Reading beneficial writing is one of those pleasures that makes you forget you are in prison. During the last four years in prison I have travelled back in time and all over the world. I have visited Jerusalem during the Crusades. I have lived in Muslim Spain. I have accompanied African slaves as they were kidnapped by European slavemasters. I have shared in the suffering of the Native Indians in North America. And I have lived with leaders, hostages, death row inmates and journalists as their writings narrated to me their stories.

Yet all of these writings amount to nothing compared to the one book that has helped me through my ordeal the most: the Glorious Quran. It is my breakfast, lunch and dinner. If I do not read my daily portion at dawn, my heart feels heavy by mid-morning. The Quran is not just a book that mentions stories which are centuries old: it is a book that mentions the present. “We have certainly sent down to you a Book in which is your mention. Will you then not reason?” (Quran 21:10)

Whosoever reads the Quran and reflects on it will find himself and his situation mentioned therein. This is only one of its many miracles.

Prison teaches you not to be judgemental of others, but to treat everyone at face value. When you deal with fellow prisoners you must deal with their present, not their past. That is the only way you will get through prison. Prison hardens you in some aspects, and softens you in others. It humbles you: laying bare your shortcomings. Since much of prison time is spent reflecting on your own past, all of your life’s wrongs come to the surface. Man cannot progress in life until he acknowledges his weaknesses and mistakes. Acknowledging that a problem exists is half of its solution.

Prison has taught me that there is a part of you that no-one can ever take from you, and that is your heart. For the heart is where true happiness resides. When you reach the stage where you are content with your destiny you have defeated your captors and become the most powerful prisoner in the world. This is what belief in Divine Destinyis all about. It is to be happy with whatever Allah has decreed for you: to be happy with your life, to be happy whether you are rich, poor, tall, short, dark or fair. When you are satisfied with your lot in life, you have won.

Every hardship is like being in prison. People feel imprisoned by ill-health, marital discord, financial insecurity, family disputes and other problems. To anyone who feels imprisoned by life’s problems I would say: be content with what you already have and never lose hope of things getting better. Be happy with your share because this is a quality of someone who truly loves Allah. When the Companion Muadh ibn Jabal (ra) was undergoing the pangs and agonies of death, he cried out,

“O Allah! Bear witness that I love You, so do with me whatsoever You wish!”

I would never have wanted to come to prison, but, looking back at these four years, I am glad that I did. I have ventured close to breaking point but due to Allah’s Grace and the support of some wonderful people I have not yet crossed it. My ordeal has been harsh, difficult and exhausting, but it has also been an adventure. Some of the happiest days of my life have been in prison. I have had experiences in prison and met people that I will never forget.

The writer Mustapha Sadiq Ar-Rafei wrote,

“When I looked into history I found a small number of individuals whose lives mirrored the lifecycle of a grain of wheat. They were torn from their roots, then crushed, then ground in mills, then kneaded with fists, then rolled out and baked in ovens at high temperatures… just so they could provide food for others.”

Patiently persevere in the face of hardship hoping for a good outcome because you never know how many dead hearts you will bring to life in the process. No hardship lasts forever. There is always an end.

(Babar Ahmad is a 34 year old British Muslim and the longest detained-without-charge British detainee held as part of the global ‘war on terror’. In December 2003 Babar was arrested at his London home under anti-terror legislation. By the time he reached the police station Babar had sustained at least 73 forensically recorded injuries, including bleeding in his ears and urine. Six days later he was released without charge.

Babar then filed a formal complaint that he had been subjected to horrific physical, sexual and religious abuse by the arresting police officers. An IPCC supervised investigation later dismissed his complaint and even “commended” one of these officers for his “great bravery” in arresting him. Babar is currently suing the Metropolitan Police for assault.

In August 2004 Babar was re-arrested in London and taken to prison pursuant to an extradition request from the US under the controversial, no-evidence-required, Extradition Act 2003. The US has alleged that in the 1990s Babar was a supporter of “terrorism”. Babar denies any involvement in terrorism. He has now been in prison for four years even
though he has not been charged in the UK.

Babar’s family, friends and campaigners have mounted a high profile campaign for his release. He recently appeared in the news when it was revealed that the police had bugged his prison visits with his MP, Sadiq Khan (Labour-Tooting). His final appeal against extradition is at The European Court of Human Rights in Strasbourg, which is due to decide on it shortly. If extradited he faces the rest of his natural life in solitary confinement in a maximum security US ‘Supermax’ prison. Further details on his case are at www.freebabarahmad.com.)

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The actual physical heart in our breast beats at about 100,000 times a day, pumping two gallons of blood per minute, 100 gallons per hour, 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year for an entire life time! The vascular system that sends this life-giving blood is over 60,000 miles long: it is more than two times the circumference of the earth. Furthermore, it is interesting to note that the heart starts beating before the brain is formed; the heart begins to beat without any central nervous system. The dominant theory was that the central nervous system is what is controlling the entire human being from the brain, yet we know now that in fact the nervous system does not initiate the heartbeat. It is actually self-initiated; we would say, it is initiated by Allah (subhanahu wa t'aalaa).

The heart is the center of the human being. Many people think the brain is the center of consciousness, yet the Qur'aan clearly states, "They have hearts that they are not able to understand with." According to the Muslims, the center of human consciousness is the heart and not the brain itself, and it is only recently that human beings have learned there are over 40,000 neurons in the heart; in other words, there are cells in the heart that are communicating. Now, it is understood that there is two-way communication between the brain and the heart: the brain sends messages to the heart, but the heart also sends messages to the brain. The brain receives these messages from the heart, which reach the amygdala and the thalamus. The cortex receives input from the amygdala and thalamus that it processes to produce emotion; the new cortex relates to learning and reasoning. These processes are recent discoveries, and although we do not fully understand them, we do know that the heart is an extremely sophisticated organ.

According to a hadeeth, the heart is a source of knowledge. The Prophet, sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said that wrong action is what irritates the heart. Thus, the heart actually knows wrong actions, and this is one of the reasons why people can do terrible things, but, ultimately, they are affected negatively.

In Crime and Punishment, the brilliant Russian author Dostoevsky's indicates that crime itself is the perpetrator's punishment because human beings have to live with the result of their actions: their souls are affected. When people do something against the heart, they act against the soul, and that actually affects human beings to the degree that they will go into a state of spiritual agitation, and people will use many ways to cover this up.

This is what kufur is: "kufur" means "covering up." To hide their agitation, people use alcohol, drugs, and sexual experimentation; they also seek power, wealth, and fame, taking themselves into a state of heedlessness, submerging themselves into the ephemeral world which causes them to forget their essential nature and to forget their hearts. Thus, people become cut off from their hearts.

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As long as You are not angry with me then I do not care,

For me is the model of Musab bin Umayr,

The best dressed man in the city,

But that was for him a state of pity.

Until there came to him the Message,

All did he leave of his privilege,

For the sake of Allah and His Beloved.

As long as You are not angry with me then I do not care,

For I think of Bilal when his chest was bare,

On the burning sand did they make him lie,

Until he thought he was going to die.

They crushed him with rocks in the blazing sun,

And begged him to reject the Almighty One,

But never did he give in to the wicked.

As long as You are not angry with me then I do not care,

I remember Khabbaab when they pulled his hair,

In the blacksmiths of his evil mistress,

With burning rods did she cause him distress.

She twisted his neck and burnt his skin,

Until his fat dripped into a tin,

But he remained firm to his belief as long as he lived.

As long as You are not angry with me then I do not care,

For I picture Khubaib when he was there,

Tied and bound to an immovable tree,

With no chance of him being free.

Their spears and arrows did they fling,

Yet grapes to him did his Lord bring,

Until his noble soul was lifted.

As long as You are not angry with me then I do not care,

I think of Yasir, Sumaiyah and their heir,

Even when placed on sizzling ember,

None but their Lord did they remember.

Patience you all when paying this price,

Indeed your abode is Paradise.

"O Lord! Forgive my people for they do not know,"

And even though I am feeling so low...

As long as You are not angry with me, then I do not care.

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By virtue of being created as human beings, we will be tested. We will be thrown into countless trials, into situations that may arise unpleasant and awkward, and into times of difficulty when it seems as though there is little reason to hope.

Tests will come at us from every direction; events will test the very core of our character and the strength of our beliefs. And these are the tests we cannot afford to fail. And Allah, Glory be to Him, has not left us empty-handed.

Building our knowledge and our characters as Muslims is the only way to overcome the mild to the severe trials we will face every day until we die. He says, "Have you not seen how Allah has given the parable of a beautiful word like a beautiful tree whose roots are firmly established, and whose branches tower in the sky? It gives its fruits at all times by the permission of its Lord, and Allah sets forth parables for mankind in order that they may remember" (Quran, 14: 24-25).

A "beautiful word" in this verse refers to the Islamic statement of belief: la illaha ill Allah (there is no deity worthy of worship except Allah). And the verse goes on to refer to a beautiful tree, which illustrates the character of a believer.

According to this verse, a believer is one whose Eemaan, or faith, is unwavering and firmly established. He or she cannot be swayed from the straight path by the winds of trials, no matter how fierce the storm. Knowing and believing that there is no being worthy of worship except Allah, Glory be to Him, and following His commandments provides a believer with the stability and confidence he or she needs to succeed.

A believer's branches also, "tower in the sky" like that of the beautiful tree. By this analogy, a believer's Eemaan cannot remain hidden. A Muslim cannot claim to have Eemaan solely in the heart, without showing it in his or her actions.

Contrary to that, Eemaan is something so significant that by its nature, it must be seen by anyone who looks at or interacts with a Muslim. Your Eemaan raises you up to a higher moral level, just as the braches of the beautiful tree reach upwards towards to the sky.

These verses also mention that this tree that is compared with a true believer, "gives its fruits at all times by the permission of its Lord." The tree of Eemaan is ever fruitful, unlike a real tree that only gives fruits at certain times of the year.

Your faith and your belief in la illaha ill Allah sustains you night and day, in every season, during times of ease and times of great hardship. This is the parable of the believer whose good deeds never take a vacation – they are continuous throughout the day and the night. The chapter goes on to say, "And the parable of an evil word is that of an evil tree uprooted from the surface of earth having no stability" (Quran 14: 26). An "evil word" in this verse refers to disbelief.

The verse describes the powerlessness and volatility of disbelief – it has no basis and he or she who disbelieves has little stability in life. The trials and difficulties of life can easily uproot such a person.

May Allah, Glory be to Him, make us be of those who are firmly rooted in their beliefs.

Islamic history is riddled with examples of Muslims who withstood tests that would seem unimaginably difficult today.

The Muslims of the past had an abundance of patience and perseverance which are two important traits of this beautiful tree of Iman.

Two Muslims who were of the most firmly rooted of believers were Sumayyah and Yasir, may God be pleased with them. After being among the first Muslims and agreeing to accept Islam in a very tumultuous period, Sumayyah and Yasir along with their son Ammar were tortured mercilessly at the hands of Abu Jahl. The family was left unprotected since they had no tribal affiliations in Makkah.

Unable to physically help them at the time, the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, would visit them and say, "be patient, O family of Yasir, because your promised place is Paradise." He would then turn his face to the sky and say, "O Lord! Forgive the family of Yasir." The Prophet (peace be upon him) also prayed for the alleviation of Ammar's suffering by placing Ammar's head in his lap and saying, "O fire! Be cool and harmless for Ammar in the same manner in which you became cool and harmless for Ibrahim."

Sumayyah and Yasir were both martyred in the cause of Allah, Glory be to Him, after refusing to leave their faith which was dearer to them than life itself. The family was honoured with the best of honours: the Prophet's guarantee of their home in paradise. These are the examples we should take as guides to our own lives. Too often do we compromise what we believe in to accommodate the uneducated assumptions of others. Too often do we forget the immense history of Islaam and Muslims.

One of the reasons we have the gift of Islaam is because we can stand with the examples of people like Sumayyah and Yasir, may Allah be pleased with them. People who did not waver, did not compromise their Eemaan to please others or even to save their own lives. Just like in our Islamic history, our strength as a community and as individuals today can only stem from the remembrance of and obedience to Allah, Glory be to Him. These times are difficult and the pain often hits close to home. But by holding fast to our belief in la illaha ill Allah, we will stay firmly rooted, our branches will tower high towards the sky, and our hearts will never lack sustenance, Allah willing.

Allah tells us that we will be tested. He also makes it clear to us what is expected from us when we undergo these trials and what our reward will be if we are successful.

He says: “Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods, lives and the fruits (of your toil) but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere. Those who, when misfortune strikes them, say: ‘Indeed we belong to Allah and to Him is our return. Those are the ones upon whom are blessings and mercy from their Lord and it is those who are rightly guided.” [Sûrah al-Baqarah: 155]

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "No fatigue, illness, anxiety, sorrow, harm or sadness afflicts any Muslim, even to the extent of a thorn pricking him, without Allah wiping out his sins by it." [Sahîh al-Bukhârî and Sahîh Muslim]

In another narration, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “No Muslim is afflicted by harm, whether it is but the prick of a thorn or something worse, without Allah expiating his evil deeds on account of it and his sins falling away from him like leaves off a tree.'" [Sahîh al-Bukhârî]

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "When Allah desires good for someone, He tries him with hardships." [Sahîh al-Bukhârî]

In reality, the entire Sacred Law is a tremendous blessing for us in this life and the next.

Obligations that initially seem difficult to fulfill have a polishing effect on the heart until eventually the one's entire perspective changes. Outward submission leads to inward submission and heart fills with love and gratitude for Allah.

Obligations are not meant to be hammered out reluctantly; they are meant to be offered in the spirit of heartfelt gratitude to Allah for the myriad blessings that each of us has been given. Someone who has realized this state will do everything for Allah; "worldly" activities such as eating, drinking, and conversing with friends are all performed with the intention of drawing closer to Allah.

Such a person will not worry over possible future problems, nor will he grieve over past difficulties, for he is busy with the One he loves. This is true happiness and anyone who misses out on it will never know the meaning of contentment.

So know that Allah is testing us because he wants good for us and he wants to see if we are going to come closer to him or more further away from him.

Shaytaan is wanting us to weaken and fail the tests from Allah so will we let shaytaan win? Or will we make the best of these opportunities and get closer to Allah than we have EVER been?

For if we are patient then Allah is with us so NOTHING can hurt or effect us!

Allah mentions in the Qur'an, “Indeed Allah is with those who are patient.”

If one is patient, and is among the ones described in the following manner in the Qur’an (al-Baqarah (2): 256)

The Reward for Patience is Paradise

‘Ata ibn Rabah related that he heard Ibn ‘Abbas say, “Shall I show you a woman of Paradise?” I said: “Yes, indeed.” He said: “A black woman came to the Prophet, peace be upon him, and said: ‘I suffer from epileptic fits, and because of these, (at times) my body becomes uncovered. Would you invoke Allah, the Exalted One, to cure me of this disease?‘

The Prophet, peace be upon him, said, ‘If you wish, you can be patient and you will attain Paradise (for this suffering). But if you prefer, I will pray to Allah, the Exalted, to cure you of it?’

The woman said, ‘I will be patient,’ then added: ‘I become uncovered (when I have fits), so invoke Allah for me that I do not become uncovered.' The Prophet, peace be upon him, then prayed for her.” [Source: Fiqh-us-Sunnah, volume 4, #1a]

Therefore, tests and calamitys can really be a blessing in disguise. If we bear with these tests, with patience and hoping for a reward from Allah, Allah willing, we may attain the Paradise of delights with complete happiness and joy...

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...First of all, it is clear that the prison system here is inept. They call this place a 'correctional facility', but I see very little correction of anyone going on around me. Most of the prisoners I've had the chance to speak to are repeat offenders, meaning they were previously jailed here, released, committed more crimes (often the same one), and were brought back. Some have been brought back so many times that they consider this home, and they consider release to be a temporary visit to some strange place. I can't deny that some are beyond hope, but the point is that people are pulled off the streets and brought in here, and nobody makes a single serious effort to get them to change their ways or give them hope of an alternative lifestyle. For example, I was in the prison van yesterday on my way back from court and struck up a conversation with a guy next to me who was losing it. So, I calmed him down, and told him to stay positive, and use his time here to clean his heart and mind, get stronger, and learn more about himself and his purpose in life, and that way he could gain more from prison than he ever would outside. he just looked at me and said, "That's the first time anyone has said something like that to me since I got here," and my words were quite simply and easy...

There are roughly 1,700 prisoners here. The only rehabilitation programs here take 50 prisoners every four months--combined! So, the remaining 1,650 are being "corrected" by people who for the most part are just here to finish an 8-hour shift and go home without a headache, and couldn't care less about the futures and interests of those they are responsible for. It's a real shame, because the way I see it, a lot of good can be done by just passing each prisoner's cell and sitting down for a short chat to let him know that he can make better choices in life, he should keep his head up, etc. Such simple, brief exchanges can go a long way in changing someone's life, if only this was the purpose of such a facility. Society in general would become much better if this approach were taken by prison staff. If you've ever seen the movie 'American History X', the turn of events there is a good example of how this can come about.

Another concept that has been reinforced in my mind is that no matter how bad things may be going for a given person, there is always someone worse off. There is always that one person you meet who gives you a reality check that reminds you that even though you are in prison going through hardship, etc., there are still things that you can take for granted. Case in point: a fellow prisoner I learned of who was just moved into the isolation unit a few cells down from me, who I had a chance to speak to when he was being moved. He told me his story, and I asked him how often he called his family, to which he replied that his mother literally told him to never contact her again until he was out. He was nearly in tears--a grown man--while questioning how a mother can turn away from her son in such a manner at his greatest time of need. After I spoke to him, I tried to put myself in his shoes, and I came to realize that despite whatever I'm going through, I never once had to worry about my family forsaking me or abandoning me. In our culture, it's generally unfathomable. However, it is these reality checks that clarify that what might be guaranteed for some isn't guaranteed for all, and we should thus realize at all times that no matter how bad you may have it, you have things that grown men will cry for. So, thanks and praise to Allah for giving us what we have.

Another example that just popped into my mind is something I read in the newspaper today. It was about a woman who had been attacked by a chimpanzee weighing 200 lbs coming on TV and showing what the chimp had done to her face: her eyes were so severely attacked that she is now blind. A flap of skin now sits where her nose used to be. Her cheeks are a series of tears, gashes, and scars. She is unrecognizable, and can only eat through a straw. I just read that, shook my head, and realized that something as basic as having an intact face, having a nose, being able to see--these were luxuries I have that this woman is now deprived of. 

Another benefit of being here is that you come to realize that the Muslim's relationship with Allah is one of give and take, and good and desirable things don't come easy. If you want something valuable, you have to be able to come up with money for it. We sometimes will wish for something, make du'aa' (supplication) that it comes to be, have high hopes, but our level of faith, worship, and attachment to Allah isn't changed at all, because we don't tend to these while making the du'aa' (supplication) for what we want. As a result, we don't achieve the desired outcome.

In the Hadith Qudsi, Allah says, "Whoever shows hostility to a Wali (friend) of Mine, I will declare war on him." So, we often pay attention to the entire sentence except for the 'Wali' part, as well as what comes next. A person reaches this level of closeness to Allah by performing many nawafil (extra) deeds--praying more, fasting more, giving more charity--so much so that Allah becomes his hearing, seeing, etc. Instead of just praying his normal twelve extra rak'aat (units of prayer), he prays twenty. Instead of praying a third of the night, he boosts it up to half the night. He makes his sujood (prostration) longer. He reads two two Juzz of the Qur'aan a day instead of his regular one juzz! He fasts four days a week instead of two. He makes his way through a series of adhkaar (formulas of remembrance) that is twice as long as what he would normally do--basically, he puts in more of his time and energy to worship Allah, and shows Him that he truly wants to become close to Him, truly wants His wilaayah (friendship, guardianship), truly loves Him, truly sees himself as a slave who is broken, humbled, weak, and is simply manifesting the reason he exists. Such a person wants to dig deeper into the treasures of faith, worship, and attachment to Allah. He knows that attachment to Allah is of levels, and he doesn't rest and is not satisfied with himself until he reaches the highest level that he can of this attachment. Only then can we complete the Hadeeth (Prophetic Narration) and say, "...If he asks Me, I will give him what he wants, and if he asks for My Protection, I will Protect him."

Reaching this level isn't easy. It takes sincerity, persistence, resolve, conviction, true certainty that Allah will give you what you want if you reach the finish line, and it requires consistency. We can't be like the people Allah describes in verse 12 and verses 22--23 in Surat Yunus, who reach this level of humility and need before Allah, get the relief they want, and then go back to the way they were before they needed relief from Him.

The point is that the deeper you go into these levels of servitude to Allah, the more evident and swift your need will be met. The level of certainty Prophet Musa had standing before the Red Sea splitting, the level of humility and need Yunus felt when he was released form the whale's grasp, the lengthy du'aa' (supplicattion) the Prophet Muhammad made before the Battle of Badr--all of these are examples of a deep level of attachment to Allah that went beyond what would exist on a daily basis while we're living in comfort, ease, and security, and this is part of the reason the response to their distress was quite literally miraculous. We can achieve the same to some extent if we reach deep enough into those treasures. And we can do that now, whether or not we are in dire need of something from Allah at the moment. And we are all in need of Him...

These are just a few of the thoughts that have occupied my mind lately. I would like to close this letter by mentioning an incident with Babar Ahmad that I have heard shortly before I was arrested. In it, he says that a fellow prisoner was about to be released. So, Babar said, "I want to apologize to you before you leave." The man asked, "For what?" Babar replied,

"When I was free, I saw your story on TV. However, it meant nothing to me, because I never thought it could happen to me. So, I did nothing for you. Now that I am in prison and it has happened to me, there are people who heard about my story and will think nothing of it, thinking it will never happen to them. Once it happens to them, others will think nothing of it and do nothing, etc..."

So, if you feel that you can just sit back and read about all these cases and do nothing to repel this injustice and that it can never happen to you, think again.

26th of Dhu al-Qa'dah, 1430 / 14th of November, 2009.

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Patience is half of faith; for this is a quality composed of patience and gratitude (Shukr). As one of the Pious Predecessors (Salaf) has said,

Faith is in two halves:

One half patience,

the other half is gratitude.

Allah, the Most High, said, "Indeed in that there are signs for each one who is patiently persevering and truly grateful" [Noble Quran 14:5]

Patience in relation to faith is like the head in relation to the body. It is of three types:

1. Patience concerning the obligations (Fardh) laid down by Allah, that one should not neglect them.
2. Patience in abstaining from actions forbidden by Him, that one should not commit them.
3. Patience concerning His judgments (Qadr) and decrees (Qadar), that one should not resent them.

Whoever perfectly fulfills these three degrees has perfected patience. For the pleasure of this world and the next, their blessings, and victory and conquest can only be reached over the bridge of patience, just as no-one reaches Paradise except by crossing over the Path. 'Umar b. al-Khattab said,

"We attained the best of life through patience."

If you reflect on the degrees of perfection acquired in the world, you will see that they are all dependent on patience. And if you reflect on imperfection, which one is blamed for possessing, you will see it all stemming from lack of patience. Thus courage and purity, goodness and love of others, all this is the patience of an hour.

Most sicknesses of the body and heart arise simply from lack of patience. And there is naught like patience for preserving the health of hearts, bodies and spirits. For it is the great remedy, the mighty antidote, even if it were to contain only the company of Allah..

"..for Allah is with the patient" [Noble Quran 2:153]

....and His affection for them for indeed...

"Allah loves those who are patient" [Noble Quran 3:146]

....and His giving victory to His people 'for victory comes with patience'; and that it is a good for the people of patience,

"And if you show patience, that is indeed the best course for those who are patient" [Noble Quran 16:126]

....and that it is the cause of prosperity;

Source: The Prophetic medicine.

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Every breath of a human, every moment of his or hers life in all religious traditions, their teachings, their guidance, their viewpoints, their perspectives is worth more than a priceless gem. These breaths the human being takes in order to survive in life and the moments of life itself are like the pearls of a necklace. Just as a pearl will embellish the appearance of that neck that wears the necklace of pearls, in the same way the life of a individual is enhanced by that person who looks after the moments of his life.

No treasure trove of any Ruler, no Sultanate of any Sultan, no Kingdom of any King, no Rulership of any Queen in tantamount is equal in value to one moment of an individuals life. Life in-fact in numerous places of the Qur'aan, either directly or indirectly, is described by Allah as a favour on human beings.

In one verse of the Qur'aan, Allah says: "How can you disbelieve? Seeing that you were dead and He gave you life. Then He will give you death, then again will bring you to life (on the Day of Resurrection) and then unto Him you will return." (Surah Al-Baqarah, Verse 28)

Out of all the bounties Allah has bestowed upon human beings, the most precious is the gift of life. Each one us should remember that this life Allah has granted us, it is not our personal possession or our personal property. In-fact it is a trust from Allah, making us merely trustees. Because we are trustees we should utilise each and every moment of our lives in the paths that please Allah.

In one verse of the Quraan Allah informs mankind, "And I (Allah) created not the jinn and mankind except that they should worship Me (Alone)". (Surah Adh-Dhariyat Verse 56)

From this verse we can learn the reason why Allah created mankind.

How precious this gift of life is, can be learnt through the Holy Quraan, Ahadeeth (Traditions and Sayings of Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him) and the Shari'ah (Islamic Law).

For instance, in one verse of the Quraan, Allah says,

"He has forbidden you only the carrion (flesh of dead animals), and blood, and flesh of swine, and that which is slaughtered as a sacrifice for others than Allah (or has been slaughtered for idols, on which Allah’s Name has not been mentioned whilst slaughtering). But if one is forced by necessity without wilful disobedience nor transgressing due limits, then there is no sin on him. Truly, Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." (Surah Al-Baqarah, Verse 173)

In the closing stages of this verse Allah talks about one who is forced to consume Haraam (unlawful) items due to the fear of death. Allah says, then there is no sin in him. For example, one is in severe hunger, such hunger that could lead to ones death, he consumes something that is Haraam (unlawful) e.g. Carrion, on the Day of Judgement he will not be questioned regarding these Haraam (Unlawful) items he consumed in order to save his life. Similarly one is fasting in the Month of Ramadhaan and severe thirst over-takes him, again it is permissible for him to break his fast in order to saves ones life. Even if he broke the fast by consuming Haraam (Unlawful) fluids e.g. Blood, Alcohol he will not be questioned regarding this. From this verse we can undoubtedly acknowledge how precious and valuable life is in the eyes of the Almighty Allah.

Life in many people’s opinion is a journey. Some even sees it as a pilgrimage. In the Islamic perspective it is a journey far beyond death. It is like a trip around the world. We stop in many different Continents, Countries, Cities, Towns and Villages. Some bring happiness and some give us grief. The white beaches, beautiful rainforests, buildings etc would force a smile on the face of many a person regardless of what grief he is in, but the sight of the poor, war-stricken and weak will give one intense grief. Life is a test from Allah, He tests people in various ways and times. He tests some by blessing them with countless bounties to see if the servant appreciates what he has been blessed with by Allah and he shows gratitude towards Allah for blessing him with these bounties. At times Allah in his infinite wisdom, puts a person in intense grief, to see if the servant turns to Allah and seeks guidance and help.

Excellent examples of both situations are found in the life and story of the Prophet of Allah, Ayyub (as). Allah granted him many bounties, then he gave him such illness that the people around him could not bear. Prophet Ayyub (as) turned to Allah for help and Allah in his infinite mercy returned all the past bounties upon him. In some narrations it has been said that Allah gave him more bounties than the amount he had before his illness.

In the Qur'aan Allah has mentioned the call for help of Prophet Ayyub (as). Allah says, "And (Remember) Ayyub (Job), when he cried to his Lord: "Verily, distress has seized me, and you are the Most Merciful of all those who show mercy". So We answered his call, and removed the distress that was on him, and We restored his family to him (that he had lost) and the like thereof along with them as a mercy from Ourselves and a reminder for all those who worship Us." (Surah Al-Anbiya Verse 83-84)

In another Surah of the Quraan Allah says regarding Prophet Ayyub (as), "And remember Our slave Ayyub (Job), when he invoked his Lord (saying):"Verily Satan has touched me with distress (by ruining my health) and torment (by ruining my wealth)! (Allah said to him): "Strike the ground with your foot: This is (a spring of) water to wash in, cool and a (refreshing) drink". And We gave him back his family, and along with them the like thereof, as a Mercy from Us, and a Reminder for those who understand."And take in your hand a bundle of thin grass and strike therewith (your wife), and break not your oath. Truly, We found him patient. How excellent a slave! Verily, he was ever oft- returning in repentance (to Us)."

Like Prophet Ayyub, each and every one of us is tested by Allah in someway or another. Some turn to Allah and seek help, as in the case of Prophet Ayyub and others turn completely to the opposite side, which leaves many in grief. These people upon whom many grieve and mourn are the people who have turned to suicide.

Suicide, or self-killing, has been known throughout the whole of recorded history and has been a phenomenon in every culture and social setting. It was noted in the Biblical Times within the Jewish and Christian faiths. It is mentioned in the Bhagavad Gita within the Hindu faith, in classical Greece and Rome, and later throughout the Middle-Ages, when the reaction to the heresy of suicide was severe hostility from the Universal Church, whose later fathers railed against the canonical sin of despair. Suicide occurs in every culture, not only in the Western developed world, but also in India, China and, despite severe theological prohibitions, in Islamic countries.

Within the Judaeo-Christian tradition, there are eleven instances of suicide described in the Bible's Old Testament and one in the New Testament. Perhaps the most famous death in the former is the suicide of King Saul following his defeat in the hands of the Philistines, heard in David’s lament, and ‘how are the mighty fallen’. Saul had sought the assistance of his bodyguard to help kill himself. The soldier was horrified at the irreligious notion of killing his appointed King, and turned the sword upon himself. Saul, apparently aided by such an example, then followed suit. It appears that the avert prohibition against suicide was first formerly pronounced by Saint Augustine, who in his City of God describes the action as a ‘moral sin’. The Church did not always condemn suicide when, for example, following some severe assault, such as rape, the victim took a ‘virtuous’ or 'honourable' way out. She could then claim sympathy and the forgiveness of her society and family, in both Roman and Christian times.

As shown, neither the Judaic nor Christian parts of the Bible are there direct injunctions against suicide. However, this is not the case in the traditions of the true religion, Islaam, which continues to be a major influence upon many Islamic people. There are a few quite specific sanctions expressed in the Qur'aan against self-killing.

Allah says explicitly in the Quraan, "And do not kill yourselves. Surely, Allah is Most Merciful to you". (Surah An-Nisa, Verse 29)

In another verse of the Quraan, Allah says, "And do not throw yourselves in destruction". (Surah Al-Baqarah, Verse 195)

The impact of this injunction still has considerable force in Islamic countries, and it may be one reason why, with the exception of Jordan and Turkey, there is no recorded suicide in national statistics of the Islamic Nations. But, in the last decade or so there has been a substantial increase of suicide in Muslims living in Non-Muslim countries, namely Britain and America.

The current attitude and dilemmas, unlike in previous times, suicide can be discussed relatively easily today, even within the mass media of the late twentieth century. For example, in the worldwide magazine 'Time' there have been three major articles concerning suicide, which while acknowledging dilemmas, were mainly concerned with where firm baselines should be drawn, accepting without question the ‘obvious’ rationality of such actions in many situations. Yet a little more than 100 years ago, Robert Louis Stevenson, in what was considered to be a horrendous book, The Suicide Club, found himself almost at the extreme end of the case of language, because he could not describe in sufficiently villainous terms the leader of this ‘devilish’ club. Constantly, modern poets and novelist have almost celebrated suicide.

The reasons that lead a person to commit suicide are as numerous and complex as the thousands of people who do so every year. Below are a few contributing causes of suicide:

Unipolar affective disorder (Depression)

The mental disorder usually called ‘depression’ is now described as ‘unipolar affective disorder’. The term depression is of course problematic, in that a low mood, or sometimes a feeling of emotional glumness, of living ‘out of sorts’ or ‘fed up’, is a frequent experience for many people. In this sense it is ‘normal’ and many people can feel ‘depressed’ without having depression. There is another side to this coin, where a person can feel particularly well, ‘on a high’ or with a feeling of well being. This can be the experience of a large number of people without it being felt, thought or obseverd as a problem or a disorder. A person simply feels in a ‘good mood’.

The causes of depression are many:

1. Mood: There is a profound disturbance of mood, which is one of the prevailing sadness and misery.

2. Cognition (To think deeply): There is an important disturbance of cognition, so that everything around them is interpreted dismally. Sufferers can believe they are hateful, worthless and, at the extreme, that they are already dead and responsible for the evils in the world.

3. Energy: There are very often tell-tale changes in mood and energy, in which the mood is especially low in the early morning hours, with relative lighting of misery in the afternoon.

4. Sleep: There is a disturbance of sleep, where it is quite usual for a person to be able to sleep almost as soon as going to bed, but with early waking, sometimes accompanied by quite enclosed changes of mood.

5. Appetite: There is a loss in appetite, and an apparently liked food turns to such, that you cannot bear the sight of it.

6. Stress: Stress at work, home, school etc can cause severe depression which can lead to suicide.

Isolation and detachment

One of the most common sentiments expressed by many of those who resort to suicidal behaviour is a sense of detachment from others. This is not so much physical isolation but refers more to a sense of moral insulation, where the individual has come to define his, or her, situation as so hopeless that others cannot help to put it right.

Substance misuse (Drugs and alcohol)

Addiction to drugs and alcohol, in this day and age, has become a major factor, which leads a person to suicide. In the past few months the media around the world have shown many cases of suicide due to drug use. Some have also predicted if drugs like cannabis was to be made legal, the death toll will increase due to this. The media have shown the devastating effects suicide has on the society around the world through drug use.

Loss of family or friends

One may feel isolated after the death or separation from family members or friends. Loss of a relative/friend causes immense grief, which may cause one to think about suicide. Some commit suicide thinking they will join the dead in the grave.

Relationship break-ups

This many times has the same effect as the death of a loved one. Sometimes it may, make some feel life is not worth living.

Financial problems

One who is large debts, thinking he will never be able to pay-up and may resort to suicide, thinking he will no more have this burdensome responsibility on his head, leaving his next of kin this problem.

Sickness and disability

Severe sicknesses, which one cannot bear, can lead one to take his life. In many cases taking help from others in doing this act (Euthanasia).

Above are only a few reasons why one may resort into taking his own life. Many others can be found by way of research.

Few events in life have the same impact on us as the suicide of a friend or a loved one. The loss of a loved one, from any cause, brings out intense grief and mourning. The response and emotions felt by the bereaved following suicide are very different to those felt after other types of deaths. The fact that a loved one's death appears to involve an element of choice, raise painful questions which deaths from natural or accidental causes do not. Bereavement by suicide is usually prolonged. The grief is characterised by agonising, questioning and the search for some explanation as to why the death of his loved one has happened. Bereavement in this way often encompasses strong feelings of abandonment and rejection.

The sense of shock and disbelief following suicide is very intense. The most common and disturbing aspect of grief after suicide is recurring images of death, even if it was not witnessed. The finding of the body can be a traumatic experience. Going over and over the very frightening and painful images of the death, and the feelings these create, is a normal process of grief.

Newly bereaved people always ask ‘why?’ However bereavement through suicide often involves a prolonged search for a reason or explanation to tragedy. Most people bereaved by suicide usually come to accept that they will never know the reason why a loved one did what they did. In the search for answers, different members of the same family may have different ideas as to why he/she took their life, it could strain family relationships, especially if an element of blame is involved.

Below, I have included statistics, which I have obtained for many different sources.

• The World Health Organisation estimates that in the year 2002 approximately 1.1million people will die from suicide
• A global mortality rate of 17 per 100,000
• One death every 40 seconds from suicide
• In the last 45 years suicide rates have increased by 65% worldwide.
• Suicide is now among the three leading causes of death amongst those aged 14-44(both sexes)
• Suicide attempts are up to 20 times more frequent than completed suicide
• Although suicide rates have traditionally been highest amongst the elderly, rates among young people have been increasing to such a rate that they are now the group at highest risk in a third of all countries
• More people die from suicide than homicide in the USA, in 1997 there were 1.5 times as many suicides as homicide
• Mental disorders (particularly depression and substance abuse) are associated with more than 90% of all causes of suicide
• Males are four times more likely to die from suicide than women are. However , females are more likely to attempt suicide than males
• 2 suicides every day by young people in the UK and Republic of Ireland
• 80% of suicides by young men
• Suicide accounts for a fifth of all deaths of young people
• An estimated 24,000 adolescents self-harmed in 1998 – 3 every hour
• Alcohol and substance misuse are significant factors in youth suicide
• Contributory factors to youth suicide include unemployment, social isolation, recent inter personal life events and difficulties with parents, peers and partners
• 6,216 suicides in the UK, 439 suicides in the Republic of Ireland
• One suicide every 79 minutes in the UK and the Republic of Ireland
• More than two young people commit suicide every day in the UK
• Suicide figures are double the death toll from road traffic accidents
• Suicide is now the second most common cause of death in the UK for young people aged between 15-24
• People who make suicide attempts or threats are not just "attention seeking", but are at the risk of harming themselves
• Most suicidal people are undecided about living or dying, and try beforehand to let others know how they are feeling, or give clues or warnings
• Somebody tries to take his own life every three minutes
• In any given week, at least 463,000 people have serious thoughts about suicide
• Every year around 2500 children or young people phone child-line about feeling suicidal
• Overdosing accounts for 50% of female suicides and 25% of male suicides
• Under 25 year olds account for 9.26% of all suicides in East Lancashire. Of which 2.3% are of Asian heritage

Statistics about suicide are difficult to collate, and many are inaccurate because of the sensitivity of the issue. According to some research suicide rates are 50%-60% higher than the official rate.

There are three areas where the law is relevant to suicide. First, while attempting to commit suicide has not been illegal in Britain since 1961, it is still a criminal offence under the ‘Suicide Act 1961’ to help someone commit suicide. Second, health professionals who do not take reasonable precautions to safeguard a suicidal patient who then goes on to commit suicide may be sued for negligence in the civil courts. Third, in some cases, people felt to be at grave risk of harming themselves can be detained for their own safety under the ‘Mental Health Act 1983’ (England and Wales), 1984 (Scotland), or ‘Mental Health Order 1986’ (Northern Ireland).

Our Beloved Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) mentioned suicide many times, a few of these incidents are recorded in Muhammad Ibn Ismael's, 'Sahih Al-Bukhari'. In one incident narrated by Thabit bin Ad-Dahhak (radh), the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "Whoever intentionally swears falsely by a religion other than Islam, then he is what he has said, (e.g. if he says, 'If such thing is not true then I am a Jew,' he is really a Jew if he is a liar). And whoever commits suicide with a piece of iron, he will be punished with the same piece of iron in the Hell-fire."

The Prophet (peace be upon him) also said, "A man was inflicted with wounds and he commited suicide, and so Allah said: My slave has caused death on himself hurriedly, so I forbid Paradise for him."

The Prophet (peace be upon him) also said, "He who commits suicide by throttling shall keep on throttling himself in the Hell-fire (forever), and he who commits suicide by stabbing himself, he shall keep stabbing himself in the Hell-fire (forever)."

From the Words of Allah and his Prophet (peace be upon him), we can see suicide is not accepted in Islam and we can also see through other sources, it is also prohibited in other religions.

If one is thinking of committing suicide he should think about his friends and family and turn to Allah and His Book and ask His help. Talking to the Scholars and others is one immense help. Confidential information is also available through your GP. Many centres also offer help for people in these troubled times.

May Allah save us from this sin and give us all guidance to the straight path. May Allah save us from all types of grief and give us all entrance into Paradise. Aaameen.

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Trials and tribulations are a part of life. We do not like them; we do not like to go through them; but eventually we accept them. Even if we pray, fast, pay our Zakat (Obligatory Annual Charity) and undertake all of the different forms of worship, we still get tested. Sadness sometimes fills our hearts. We could be the best of practicing Muslims, yet poor and unable to put food on our table. We could be rich yet lonely, or young yet unhealthy.

It is in these instances that shaytaan starts toying with our head. We look at what others have, especially the non-Muslims, and our core gets rattled. The shaytaan ignites a fire that gets our blood boiling, hopelessness and frustration set in, and we ask, “Oh Allah, why me?! Why am I being punished?”

Psychologists tell us that human beings go through five stages of emotion when struck with a calamity. Understanding the different stages of grief minimizes the first four stages (which are denial, anger, bargaining and depression) and gets us to the final stage – which is acceptance. I went through these stages on many different occasions, as I am sure you have.

I am not a psychologist nor am I trying to refute the works of psychology, but I would nonetheless like to offer a different view, a Qur’anic view, on how to deal with life’s trials.

Though we do not have a say in when we are born nor in when we die, life has a clear beginning and a clear end. What is sometimes unclear is the journey between the two points. For Muslims, however, the journey could not be any clearer. Allah says in Surat Adh-Dhaariyaat, “And I (Allah) created not the jinn and mankind except that they should worship Me (Alone)” (Qur’an, 51:56).

Now think back to the first paragraph of this article. You might think to yourself, “I pray five times a day, I fast during Ramadan and pay my Zakaat, yet I have an ill child, or still can’t find a job, or this stressor or that.” You begin to wonder why you are going through this and why you are being “punished.” Before you know it, shaytaan takes the helm and you are on a slippery slope of anger and denial.

Before falling down that slope, one must take a deep breath and ponder the following question: is it punishment or is it a manifestation of what Allah has told us in Surat Al-Ankaboot, “Do people think that they will be left alone because they say: “We believe,” and will not be tested?” (Qur’an, 29:2)

Allah tells us that through this journey we call life we will be tested. In Surat al-Baqarah, He says, “And certainly, We shall test you with something of fear, hunger, loss of wealth, lives and fruits…” (Qur’an, 2:155)

Tribulations are a part of life but that doesn’t make them easy. We still grieve — but how could we not? We are, after all, a very emotional creation. So how does one cope with adversity? There are many verses in the Qur’an that speak about different mechanisms of coping such as patience, faith, prayer and acceptance. But what I find the most profound and the most comforting is what Allah says in Surat al-Baqarah, “Allah does not burden a soul beyond that it can bear…” (Qur’an, 2:286).

If you stand back and take a look at the whole picture, you will realize that what you have when faced by a tragedy is a choice. Will you go through the stages of grief, denying Allah’s destiny and the wisdom of His plan for you? Or will you realize that what you are going through is something you know you can handle? Whatever trial comes your way is something that Allah has planned and which He has guaranteed you can handle. This verse is comforting because I, as a faithful believer, Allah willing, believes in Allah and His wisdom, know deep in my heart that although the sadness is cumbersome it will not be overwhelming; that although the times might be tough, I am tougher; and that whatever comes my way will go away; and that eventually I will face my Lord whom, I hope, will be pleased with me as I am pleased with Him.

So when you go through a difficult situation, be it the inevitable death of a loved one or the loss of a job or just a flat tire on the side of the highway, take a deep breath and say,

“Say: ‘Nothing shall ever happen to us except what Allâh has ordained for us…’” (9:51).

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A man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole. Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could, and it could go no further.

So the man decided to help the butterfly. He took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon.

The butterfly then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings.

The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time.

Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It never was able to fly.

What the man, in his kindness and haste, did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were Allah's way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.

Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our lives. If Allah allowed us to go through our lives without any obstacles, it would cripple us.

We would not be as strong as what we could have been. We could never fly!

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Al-Hakeem reports in al-Mustadrak that the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) said, "Allah will suffice he, who makes his worry in life one; and he, who is branched by worries, Allah will not care in whichever valley of life he perishes."

The meaning of this is that one should concentrate one's worries from beginning to end on obeying Allah (subhanahu wa ta`ala) and preparing oneself for his meeting, for this is the greatest of all worries, and the greatest of all matters.

For this very reason Messengers were sent, and Divine Books were revealed, and the trade of Paradise and Hell was set, and the Siraat (the bridge over Hellfire) was laid down, and for which the Scale was put forth.

He who Allah made to see and awakened his heart, gathers his concerns and directs his thought towards the meeting with his Creator and Master. For this matter is enough to engage one and exhaust all the rest. Furthermore, the more life enters the heart the more the worry and the preparation. You will not find a man knowledgeable in his religion, sound in his mind but had gathered his soul in this very worry. He would not work, stand nor sit down but in awe of God, unique in his highness and the greatest of all duties ordained. His senses would be directed to serving his master and his tongue would only speak of his praise, and his heart would beat with gratitude, and his eyes would show his deep love with truthful tears.

Allah says, "In the creation of the heavens and the earth, and the alternation of night and day, there are Signs for people of intelligence: those who remember Allah standing, sitting and lying on their sides." (3:190-191)

As for he who channels his worries in all matters of life, don't ask about his well-being, for he is anxious, disturbed, perplexed, sorrowful and lost without any sort of benefit. He is forever in continuous sadness because whoever falls in love with life is killed and who lusts for it will fall sick and who serves it will end up disappointed.

We ask Allah (subhanahu wa ta`ala) to channel all our worries in pleasing him, and dedicate our lives for his obedience, and his worship. Aaameen.

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A little boy asked his mother, "Why are you crying?" "Because I need to" she said. "I don't understand," he said.

His Mom just hugged him and said, "And you never will."

Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?" "All women cry for no reason," his dad answered carelessly.

The little boy, still wondering why women cry, finally asked the old wise Shaykh (his Islamic Teacher). "He surely knows the answer", he thought.

"Ya Shaykh! Why do women cry so easily?"

The wise teacher replied,

"When Allah made the woman she had to be made so special. He made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort. He gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that comes from her children.

He gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining. He gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child hurts her very badly. He gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.

He gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.

And lastly, He gave her a tear. This is hers and only hers exclusively to use whenever she needs it. She needs no reason, no explanation, it’s hers...

You see my son, the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the beauty of her face, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides."

The little boy found the answer and never asked the same question again.

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Who was he?

He was a famous Taabi'ee (Successors of the Sahabah), a scholar of Hadeeth (Prophetic Narration) who was born in the penultimate year (22AH) of the caliphate of Umar (radhiallahu `anhu) and died 94AH. His father was az-Zubair ibn A’wwam, one of the ten Promised with Paradise. His mother was Asma daughter of Abu Bakr, and therefore his aunt was Aa’ishah, the mother of the Believers from whom he benefited immensely. He also learnt from Ali bin Abi Talib, Abdur-Rahman bin Awf, Zaid bin Thabit, Abu Ayub Al-Ansari and many other sahaabah until he became one of the seven Fuqahaa’ [scholars of Islamic Jurisprudence] of Medina upon whom the people depended.

U’rwah applied his knowledge into his actions. He would even fast during the hottest days in Madinah and would always stand for night prayers. He would keep his tongue moist with the remembrance of Allah. He would read a fourth of the Quran from a mushaf (copy of the Qur’aan) during the day and then he would repeat that it heart in his night prayers. And it is not known that he left this practice from his early youth up until the day he died except on one occasion...

Urwah bin Zubayr was invited by the khalifah, al-Walid bin Abdul-Malik (705-715 CE, 6th Khalifah of Bana Ummaya) in Damascus. U’rwah accepted the invitation and went with his eldest son Muhammad, who was one of the most handsome of men. The young man had dressed up for the occasion in fine clothes, and had done up his hair. Al-Walid welcomed them with honour and when he saw his son, he said,

"This is how the young people of Quraysh should look!"

and by saying so, he put the evil eye on him. Before he left, the young man fell ill. When he was in the stable (preparing for the journey) and admiring the khalifa's fine horses, one of the horses trampled him to death.

The grief-stricken father had barely shaken off the dust from burying his son, when he developed gangrene of the foot. His leg became swollen and the gangrene began to spread at frightening speed. Al-Walid sent for the best doctors to cure his guest by any means possible. But the doctors were unanimously united on the fact that the only cure for him was amputation quickly before the gangrene spreads and kills him. 'Urwah seeing no other choice agreed.

When the surgeon came to amputate his leg with his scalpel and a saw, he said to U’rwah,'I think it would be appropriate for us to give you a mouthful of intoxicant so that you do not feel the excruciating pain of amputation'.

'Urwah replied,

'No, I will not do that. I will not seek help by taking that which is impermissible, for that which I forgiveness (of Allah) from'.

So the doctor said, 'So we will give you some tranquilizer’.

'Urwah replied,

'I do not wish to be deprived of one of my limbs without me feeling its pain for that for which I aspire the reward of Allah for’.

Then, just before the surgeon was about to cut his leg, a group of men came to them, so U’rwah said,

'Who are these people?’

It was said to him, 'They have been sent for, so that they can hold you, since perhaps when the pain becomes severe, it might cause you to pull back your leg causing you harm.'

'Urwah replied,

'Send them back! I have no need of them as I hope that dhikr (the remembrance of Allah ('azza wa jall)) and tasbeeh (glorify Allah) will suffice me of them.'

So the surgeon began by first cutting off his flesh with a scalpel and when he reached his bone, he started to saw. All that could be heard from Urwah was ‘Laa ilaaha ill Allah (there is none worthy of worship except Allah)’ and ‘Allahu akbar (Allah is the Greatest)’ until his leg was cut off. Then boiling oil was brought in an iron scoop, and was poured on 'Urwah's leg to stop the pouring of blood and close the wound. Urwah at this point lost consciousness and fell into such a deep sleep that he did not read his normal portion of Qur’aan that day. This was the only time when he did not perform his regular good deed.

When he regained consciousness, he called for his amputated leg, kissed it and said while turning it in his hand,

"I swear by the One, Who mounted me on you, I never used you to walk to any place of wrong action or to any place where Allah would not like me to be in."

Then he gave instructions that the leg should be washed, perfumed, wrapped in a cloth and buried in the Muslim graveyard. 'Urwah was carried to his hometown of Madinah where the people and his family gathered to meet him, whereupon he promptly said:

"Do not be frightened with what you see. Allah has bestowed upon me four sons and He has taken back one and allowed me to remain with three, so for Him is the Praise. Allah has given me four limbs and has taken one and allowed me to remain with three, so for Him is the praise. I swear to you by Allah, that if he has taken from me a little, then he has caused to remain with me much, and if he has tried me once then he has forgiven me many times."

Many people came to from the scholars and leaders to offer their condolences to 'Urwah, but of the best words given were those of Ibrahim bin Muhammad bin Talha, when he said.

"Receive the glad tidings! O Abu Abdullah (his kunya, agnomen: ‘Father of Abdullah’) one of your limbs and one of your sons has preceded you to Paradise… and behind that which has gone, the others shall follow inshaa’ Allah (Allah willing)… and Allah has caused to remain for us from you that which we are in need of and that which we cannot do without, and that is your knowledge, your understanding and your opinion… May Allah continue to benefit us with it."

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Allaah has foreordained the fate of all creatures, written down their impacts and deeds, portioned out between them their livelihood and wealth and created death and life that He may test them which of them is best in deed. Indeed, belief in Allaah's decree and preordainment is one of the pillars of faith. Nothing happens in this universe except by His will.

This life is full of misfortune and sorrow. It is destined to be a place of hardships and trouble. Trials and tribulations are as inevitable in this life as cold and heat. Allaah says, {And certainly We shall test you with something of fear, hunger, loss of wealth, lives and fruits, but give glad tidings to those who are patient.}

Pre-destination is a test by which the truthful ones are distinguished from untruthful ones. Allaah says, {Do people think that they will be left alone because they say, 'We believe,' and will not be tested.}(29: 2)

The human soul does not become pure except through trials, and it is during tribulations that real men are known. Ibn Jawzee said,

"Whoever wants to have everlasting peace and well-being with no affliction does not understand the meaning of Allaah's commandments, nor does he perceive the meaning of submission to Allaah. Every soul (either believing or disbelieving) shall inevitably taste suffering in this world, for this life is based on hardships. Man lives between comfort and suffering. Prophet Aadam, for instance, had the angels prostrated before him and yet was soon after expelled from paradise."

A believer is afflicted with trials in order to refine him, not to punish him. He is tested in ease as well as in hardship. Allaah says, {And We tried them with good (blessings) and evil (calamities) in order that they might turn (to Allaah's obedience).} (Al-A'raaf 7: 168).

Something undesirable may sometimes have a pleasant result, while something seemingly desirable may turn out to have an unpleasant and abominable result. Do not therefore feel that harmful things cannot come to you through hardship. Allaah says,

{...And it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allaah knows, and you do not know.} (Al-Baqarah 2: 216).

Prepare yourself mentally for afflictions before they occur so as to make their occurrence light on you. Do not be worried because of tribulations, for they have their limits, and watch what you utter during your hard times for many a word has ruined the one who utters it. A resolute Muslim stands firm during hardships, his heart does not change and he does not complain. Console yourself, whenever you are afflicted with trials and tests, with a promise of reward from Allaah. Wise people show endurance whenever they are stricken with misfortune so as not to add to their misfortune the malicious joy of their enemies, for whenever your enemies know of your misfortune they are overjoyed.

Endeavour to keep your misfortunes and pains to yourself, for concealment of afflictions and pains are of the qualities of noble people. Be patient over afflictions, they will soon be removed from you. Those who perished only suffered that because of their impatience while the patient ones are being recompensed with good rewards. Allaah says, {And those who are patient, we will certainly pay them a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do.} (Al-Anaam 16:96).

The reward of the patient ones will be doubled for their patience and Allaah will be with them, remove their afflictions and make them victorious.

O afflicted one! Your Lord does not deny you what you want except what is better than that, He does not test you but for your well-being and He does not subject you to tribulations but to purify you. He tries His slaves with pleasure as he blesses them with calamity. Do not therefore waste your time thinking over what has already been guaranteed for you. As long as one is still alive his provision will no doubt come to him. Allaah (ta'ala) says, {And no (moving) living creature is there on earth but its provision is due from Allaah.} (Hood 11:6).

Further, if Allaah - out of His wisdom - closes a door against you, He opens out of His mercy a door better for you than the closed one. It is by afflictions that righteous and understanding people are increased in rank and reward. Sa'ad bin Abee Waqqaas said, I said, "O Messenger of Allaah, who are the most afflicted of all people?

He (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) replied, "The Prophets, then the righteous people, then those who are nearest to them in perfection and those who are nearest to them. Man is tested according to his religiosity; if he is strong religiously, his test is increased and if he is weak in religion, his test is reduced. And a believer will be tested until he walks on the earth sinless [i.e. his sins have been erased by series of afflictions that he endured.]" (Al-Bukhari)

Fellow Muslims! Prophet Aadam laboured along difficult paths beset with affliction; Prophet Ibraheem was thrown into a blazing fire; Ismaeel was laid down for slaughter; Yoonus was swallowed by a whale; Prophet Aayoob suffered from a severe illness; Yoosuf was sold for a pittance, thrown into a well and wrongfully jailed and Muhammed (saws) suffered different kinds of injury. You also are on a path of calamities by being in this world, for this life does not contain untainted and pure happiness, that will only come about in Paradise.

The Prophet (saws)) said, “If Allaah wants to do good to somebody, He afflicts him with trials.” (Al-Bukharee). Some people of knowledge said,

“Whoever Allaah creates for paradise will face trials and undesirable things."

That is because comforts that do not bring one closer to Allaah are, in themselves, a kind of tribulation. Do not therefore grieve over what you miss in worldly materials, for worldly pleasure begets pain and disobedience. Aboo Dardaa said,

"Of the insignificance of this world to Allaah is that He is not disobeyed except in it, while what is with Him cannot be obtained except by abstaining from it. Engage yourself in what will benefit you more. Keep away from what is in peoples' hands you will be the wealthiest of them; do not lose hope in Allaah's mercy lest you are disgraced; always remember Allaah's favour on you and drive away your distress by being pleased with Allaah's decree, for however long the night may be, it will be followed by the dawn. Supplicate to Allaah. He will give you relief and if you are patient Allaah will provide a way out for you. Ponder over the story of Prophet Ya'qoob who lost a son for a long period and yet did not lose hope of relief from the Almighty One, but rather said, "Maybe Allaah will bring them all (back) to me."

It is only Allaah who deserves all praise and is capable of attending to all complaints. It is only Him you must beseech to remove your misfortunes. Pray to Him during the night with submission and humbleness and request Him to make your affairs easy for you. He says, {Is it not He who responds to the distressed one when he calls Him?} (27: 62)

Put your trust in the Omnipotent Lord and take refuge with Him with a humble heart, He will open the doors of His mercy for you. Fudayl ibn 'Iyaadh said,

"If you lose hope in all people and you do not ask anything from them, your Lord will give you all that you want."

Whoever leaves his affairs to the hands of Allaah will achieve what he aspires: Always recite the prayer of Prophet Yoonus, "None has the right to worshipped except You (O Allaah) Glorified (and exalted) are You (above all that they associate with You) Truly I have been of the wrong doers."

The 'Ulamaa said,

"No one in distress recites this prayer except that Allaah gives him relief from his distress."

Ibn al-Qayyim said,

"It has been tested that whoever says: "Verily distress has seized me and You are the most merciful of all those who show mercy!" Seven times Allaah relieves him of his distress!

Put then yourself under the protection of Allaah, depend upon Him, submit your affairs to Him and ask Him for relief. Try to supplicate in the most appropriate periods like during prostration and the last hour of the night. Do not feel uneasy if your supplications have not yet been answered, and do not lose hope of Allaah's mercy even though the period of your affliction may seem long, for relief is near, and continue to pray to Allaah. Also know that when Allaah afflicts you no one except Him is capable of removing that affliction for He does whatever He wills.

If your provision seems delayed, do a lot of istighfaar (asking Allah's forgiveness), for misdeeds necessitate punishment; and if it does not seem that your supplications are having any impact, then examine yourself, for it may be that you have not been sincere in your repentance. Endeavour also, to give charity to the needy, for charity prevents and removes affliction.

However, if your affliction is removed, give a lot of thanks and praise to your Lord and know that a false sense of safety is a big trial. Allaah says,

{Say: Nothing shall ever happen to us except what Allaah has ordained for us. He is our Lord and Protector, and in Alaah let the believers put their trust.} (At-Taubah 9: 51).

No condition is permanent. Fortunate is he who is always God-conscious. Fear Allaah in any condition you may find yourself. You can do nothing to prevent what has been destined to happen as you do nothing to attain what has not been pre-ordained. The ability to choose and control is with Allaah alone and His choice for His slave is better for him than his choice for himself. Dawood bin Sulaymaan said,

"Three things indicate the piety of a believer; his trust in Allaah in what he has not attained; his satisfaction with whatever he has attained and his patience over what he has missed."

Shurayh said,

"A slave will not be afflicted by a trial except that he finds three blessings therein,

(1) That the trial has nothing to do with his religion,

(2) That the trial was not bigger than it is, and

(3) That Allaah gives him patience to bear it."

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In the spiritual sense, sabr (patience) means to stop ourselves from despairing and panicking, to stop our tongues from complaining and to stop our hands from striking our faces & tearing our clothes at times of grief and stress. What follows are some amazing, life-changing verses from the Qur'aan and some blessed statements of the Prophet, may Allah's peace and blessings be upon his noble soul.

If contemplated over sincerely, these verses and narrations will make a mountain of trials and tests feel as insignificant and small as a prick of a thorn.

Verses from the Qur'aan Pertaining to Patience

Allah says:

{Seek help in patience and prayer; and truly it is hard save for the humble-minded.} (2:45)

{O you who believe! seek assistance through patience and prayer; surely Allah is with the patient.} (2:153)

{Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere.} (2:155)

{It is not righteousness that ye turn your faces Towards east or West; but it is righteousness- to believe in Allah and the Last Day, and the Angels, and the Book, and the Messengers; to spend of your substance, out of love for Him, for your kin, for orphans, for the needy, for the wayfarer, for those who ask, and for the ransom of slaves; to be steadfast in prayer, and practice regular charity; to fulfil the contracts which ye have made; and to be firm and patient, in pain (or suffering) and adversity, and throughout all periods of panic. Such are the people of truth, the Allah-fearing.} (2:177)

{Do you think that you will enter the garden while Allah has not yet known those who strive hard from among you, and (He has not) known the patient.} (3:142)

{......and Allah loves the patient.} (3:146)

{O you who believe! be patient and excel in patience and remain steadfast, and be careful of (your duty to) Allah, that you may be successful.} (3:200)

{What is with you passes away and what is with Allah is enduring; and We will most certainly give to those who are patient their reward for the best of what they did.} (16:96)

{And those who were given the knowledge said: Woe to you! Allah's reward is better for him who believes and does good, and none is made to receive this except the patient.} (28:80)

{Surely the men who submit and the women who submit, and the believing men and the believing women, and the obeying men and the obeying women, and the truthful men and the truthful women, and the patient men and the patient women and the humble men and the humble women, and the almsgiving men and the almsgiving women, and the fasting men and the fasting women, and the men who guard their private parts and the women who guard, and the men who remember Allah much and the women who remember-- Allah has prepared for them forgiveness and a mighty reward.} (33:35)

{Say: O my servants who believe! be careful of (your duty to) your Lord; for those who do good in this world is good, and Allah's earth is spacious; only the patient will be paid back their reward in full without measure.} (39:10)

{And if We make man taste mercy from Us, then take it off from him, most surely he is despairing, ungrateful. But if We give him a taste of (Our) favours after adversity hath touched him, he is sure to say, "All evil has departed from me:" Behold! he falls into exultation and pride. Except those who are patient and do good, they shall have forgiveness and a great reward.} (11:9-11)

{Verily, along with every hardship comes ease. Verily, along with every hardship comes ease} (94:5). And he knows that there is only one hardship and two eases. The Muslim recognises the good in the hardship, so he is able to endure patiently, waiting for Allah's reward, and the promised relief.

Ahaadeeth (Sayings of the Prophet - Peace Be Upon Him - Pertaining to Patience)

The following Prophetic narrations have been taken from Saheeh al Bukhari:

Narrated Anas bin Malik, the Prophet passed by a woman who was weeping beside a grave. He told her to fear Allah and be patient. She said to him, "Go away, for you have not been afflicted with a calamity like mine." And she did not recognize him. Then she was informed that he was the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam). So she went to the house of the Prophet and there she did not find any guard. Then she said to him, "I did not recognize you." He said, "Verily, the patience is at the first stroke of a calamity."

Narrated Abu Sa'eed Al-Khudhri, some Ansaar [Companions of Madinah] asked for (something) from Allah's Apostle (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) and he gave it to them. They again asked him again for (something) and he again gave it to them. And then they asked him and he gave them again till all that was with him finished. Then he said, "If I had anything. I would not keep it away from you. (Remember) Whoever abstains from asking others, Allah will make him content, and whoever tries to make himself self-sufficient, Allah will make him self-sufficient. And whoever remains patient, Allah will make him patient. Nobody can be given a blessing better and greater than patience." [Volume 2, Book 24, Number 548]

Narrated Abu Hurairah, Allah's Apostle said, "The example of a believer is that of a fresh tender plant; from whatever direction the wind comes, it bends it, but when the wind becomes quiet, it becomes straight again. Similarly, a believer is afflicted with calamities (but he remains patient till Allah removes his difficulties.) And an impious wicked person is like a pine tree which keeps hard and straight till Allah cuts (breaks) it down when He wishes." [ Volume 7, Book 70, Number 547]

Narrated Anas bin Malik, Allah's Apostle sent for the Ansar and gathered them in a tent and said to them, "Be patient till you meet Allah and His Apostle, and I will be at the lake-tank (Al-Kawthar)." [Volume 9, Book 93, Number 533]

Narrated 'Aa’isha, the wife of the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam), that Allah's Apostle said, "No calamity befalls a Muslim but that Allah expiates some of his sins because of it, even if it was the prick he receives from a thorn." [Volume 7, Book 70, Number 544.]

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Category: Patience and Contentment

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Have you ever longed for that one special dish or dessert, but could not find the exact ingredient to make it quite right? Have you ever wished that you could call up your dearest friend and invite her over for tea and conversation, but knew that was impossible?

Have you ever had a new baby and wished deeply in your heart that your own mother could be there to share this wonderful experience with you and to provide you with support, comfort, and advise? Have you ever felt such deep sorrow and pain that you cried until the tears would no longer come?

If you are one of the many people “away from home” you may have experienced some or all of these wishes and feeling. Homesickness, loneliness, and missing family and friends are all very familiar to people in this situation. With the growing number of immigration to North American, this is becoming an important issue that needs to be addressed within communities. This is particular true women who many have moved with their husbands and begin to feel isolated and lonely while their husbands work throughout the day, sometimes for long hours. It may also be more intense for women who are attempting to truly implement Islam in their lives as Muslim women, with the pressure and influence of the Kufr environment, there may be a great deal of fear, uncertainty, and suspicion for new residents. Being away from a more Islamic environment can only add the psychological stress of homesickness. Struggles with maintaining Islamic dress is a common concern related to this area.

The stress and challenges experienced in a new land may be magnified if children are involved. There may be concern about being able to instil Islamic values in children in an environment where these values are not the norm. The pressure upon children and youth is probably even greater than those faced by adults. In many ways the upbringing of children is likely to be more different since the major support of extended family and friends is no longer available. This would be most evident in such areas as physical care, discipline, and monitoring.

So how is a Muslimah to cope with new challenges? There are certain positive steps that she can take and there are other areas where other sisters may be of assistance. The following is a list of those suggestions:

Suggestions for the New Arrival

1. Develop a strong support system. Whenever anyone arrives in an unfamiliar land it is important to begin to develop a new support system from the very beginning. Building a supplementary family and network in the new location can best alleviate homesickness and loneliness. If there is a large Muslim community in the area, opportunity for friendships should automatically be available through the local masaajid and halaqas (Islamic Circles). Lina is a sister who recently came to America from Jordan with her new husband. She stated that her transaction has been less difficult than she anticipated primarily because she already knew one sister here and has met many new people and begun to develop friendships. Many of her contacts have been made through visits to the local masaajid. She reported that because of this and a supportive husband she has experienced very little homesickness and feels that she is coping well.

2. Focus on the positive aspects. Being “away from home” may actually turn to be a wonderful experience with myriad opportunities for personal growth and achievement. Free from the tangled intricacies of familial and cultural ties, a women may begin to determine who she really is, as an individual and find ways to strengthen her character, her eemaan (faith), and her roles as a wife and mother. It may also open the door to educational opportunity both in relation to the deen (religion) and to personal career interest. There are many programs that offer course through correspondence so that a woman can study in her home and tailor this to fit her interests and schedule. Lina stated that she has been to a masjid more often in this country during her short stay than throughout her lifetime back home. She reported that few women visit the masaajid in her home country except during Ramadhaan, and she was not aware of any halaqahs (Islamic educational circle) for the education of sisters. In America she has started to join a halaqah for Arabic speakers and teaches Arabic for an English halaqah. She will also begin a course this semester to study how to use the computer.

3. Find ways to fill time through I'baadah (worship). There are many ways to keep oneself busy, especially in the worship of Allah, subhanahu wa ta’ala. It is in times of needs when the hearts is likely to be softer and one may turn to Allah more often. Sincere 'Ibaadah (worship), such as Salah, reading Qur’an, fasting, Dhikr (uttering words of remembrance of Allah, the Almighty), etc, should be increased during this time as a sign of complete reliance upon Allah. Other activities that can be considered worship include: increasing ones knowledge of Islaam by reading Islamic books and materials; participating in daw’ah (Islamic propogational) activities, halaqah (Islamic circle) activities, children’s programs; adopting an Islamic cause such as charity projects, social programs, sharing knowledge with others, etc. There are number of many already established that would definitely need the help of extra volunteers. This may be an excellent opportunity to draw nearer to Allah.

Suggestions for Natives and more Seasoned Immigrants

1. Help to make new sisters feel at home. Some elements of “home” can be recreated here and be important in alleviating homesickness. Sisters may generate discussion by inquiring about the new sister’s homeland, customs, language, foods, etc. A familiar dish, desert, or spice may be brought for the sister or she may be shown local stores that carry idea to invite her to share information about her homeland with the halaqa (Islamic circle), such as the social, political, economic aspects. All of these steps will help to make sister feel that “home” was not completely left behind.

2. Assist in the transition. Many women may be very unfamiliar with the “American” culture so it is important to increase their understanding so that they will be better prepared to deal with it. This may involve providing information and giving advice about how to handle specific issues, particularly related to the rearing of children. Not only will this be very beneficial for the sister so that she can avoid difficult or embarrassing situations, but it will make the overall transition much smoother.

3. Break down the barriers. New immigrants may not only be suspicious and wary of American culture, but they may also feel this way about American women. This barrier may be even more complex to overcome than any language barrier that may be present. American women who have converted to Islaam may share their conversion story and what the change has meant for them. Oftentimes sisters will discern the shared challenges and obstacles that transcend cultural differences. For example, wearing hijaab (the head-scarf) in an unIslamic environment is just as difficult for new converts as it is for immigrants, and maybe even more so if it is a recent modification. Through social contact and sharing of lives sisters will see that the commonality of Islam is what brings them together.

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In Surat al-'Asr, Allah says, {Verily, man is in loss, except those who believe and do good deeds and encourage one another towards truth and encourage one another towards patience}.(104:2-3)

Patience is a sign of the Muslim character. I know a lady who taught me a great deal. She probably does not even know how much she affected me, for it was not anything she said. It was purely her actions.

This lady had a daughter who was about 11 or 12 years old. She had been sick for a few years. The young girl had been taken to the hospital because her heart and lungs were giving out on her. This had become a routine for them. She went to the hospital, they treated her, and she went home. This time, however, it was different. This time, the doctor took the family into a small room - the consultation room. He told this woman that this time there was nothing that could be done. The damage had become too extensive. Essentially all that they could do was keep her comfortable. This lady started to cry, to get really upset. Then, unexpectedly, she was extremely calm. This lady lived up to her name, Sakeenah (peace), for she showed the utmost in tranquillity. She said,

"No! I will not do this. Allah does not expect this of me. Doctor, tell me what I have to do."

By Allah, the doctor, who was used to the grief expressions of the Kuffaar (non-Muslims), was astonished. He had to pull himself together before he could continue. I know he had never seen anything like this. What a beautiful da'wah (call to Allah) this woman gave, may Allah increase her reward.

She avoided the easy route, the one no one would have blamed her for taking. After all, she was a mother about to lose her beloved daughter, but the thought that came to her was, "What would Allah want?" Glory be to Allah, Allah reward her. This woman, in her love to Allah, in her show of patience, taught me better than a thousand books or a hundred lectures. She showed me what true Muslim patience is. As expected, the young girl died soon after. Sakeenah cried a mother's tears, but she was never excessive in her grief, and she was a marvellous example to her other children. They too showed honour and deen (religiosity) in their mourning of the young girl.

This is Islam, and this is patience. This family taught all of us in the community how to deal with hardship in its hardest form. They helped others to know the right way, and if Allah (subhaanahu wa ta'ala) wills, they gained the reward from Allah for teaching us as well as for their simple obedience to the Almighty.

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From time to time we all experience challenges. It could be when we encounter some difficult situations in our life or business or we have problems with health or even just day to day issues. What is really important is how we face up and react to those challenges. Our attitude and trust in our Creator will determine how much we succeed.

Attitude Leads to Altitude!

According to scientists, the bumblebee's body is too heavy and its wing span too small. Aerodynamically, the bumblebee cannot fly. But the bumblebee doesn't know that and it keeps flying.

When you don't know your limitations, you go out and surprise yourself. In hindsight, you wonder if you had any limitations! The only limitations a person has are those that are self-imposed. Don't let physical conditions dictate how you respond to life’s challenges.

There is a story about a group small frogs who took part in a race.The goal was to reach the top of a very high tower. A big crowd had gathered around the tower to see the race and cheer on the contestants. Then they were off!

No one in the crowd really believed that the tiny frogs would reach the top of the tower and they began to yell things like:

“Oh, way too difficult!!”, “They will NEVER make it to the top”, “Not a chance that they will succeed. The tower is too high!”

The tiny frogs began collapsing one by one, but there were some that were managing to climb higher and higher.

The crowd continued to yell: “It is too difficult!!! No one will make it!”

More tiny frogs got tired and gave up. But one frog continued higher and higher and higher. This one wasn’t giving up!

At the end, every other frog had given up climbing the tower except for the one tiny frog who, after great effort, was the only one who reached the top! All of the other tiny frogs naturally wanted to know how this one frog managed to do it?

A contestant asked the tiny frog who had succeeded how it had found the strength to reach the goal?

It turned out…that the winner was deaf.

Never listen to people who have a tendency of negative or are pessimistic because they may impede your progress and stop you from achieving your dreams. Everything that you hear and see can affect you in so many ways. So filter and entertain only those that will have a positive bearing on your life.

                   “Indeed, Allaah will not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves.”

                                                                          (Qur’aan, 13:11)

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Isn’t it amazing how we can tell when a true leader walks into a room?

• They command attention.
• They possess a certain aura that makes them stand out.
• They have influence and are wonderful communicators.
• Everyone loves them because of their charisma and their strong display of power.

But it’s not only power that makes a leader great, because power can only go so far. Here are six distinct qualities that I believe all great leaders have that makes the organizations they lead exemplary ones.

1. Great leaders have vision.

A leader is a visionary. They can see the big picture long before anyone else can and will move companies along that path strategically. It is said that without vision, the people perish. Companies can’t run successfully on their own. It takes vision and a great leader to carry it effectively. Many people feel that at the end of the day, it’s all about the bottom line. But it’s how you get to that bottom line that is important, and it’s predicated on a strong visionary.

2. Great leaders pave the way for others to succeed.

Strong morale is the by-product of organizations that possess a leader with charisma. Everyone wants to do their job and do it well when they feel they are appreciated. Great leaders reward those who go above and beyond and push the envelope of potential in everyone. They are fair and forthright in delegating tasks to others, making sure apprentices understand their assignments thoroughly, thus allowing them to soar. They don’t mind promoting those they have mentored because they don’t feel threatened by those who follow them. They are willing to raise up others like them, to make their own work easier by giving others the responsibility for the task at hand.

3. Great leaders walk in integrity.

Because the demands are great for these leaders, they have no time for games or to say something and not mean it. Great leaders walk the walk and talk the talk. They expect those around them to do the same in order to be on their team. Integrity is their middle name and they thrive in their roles because others gravitate towards doing business with them, knowing full well that anyone privileged to work with them will benefit from a strong, honest partnership that upholds the highest level of loyalty and solidarity.

4. Great leaders create a sense of purpose to their work.

When you know the reasons for doing what you do, it makes doing that work easy and fun. Many employees want a fun environment to work in, and when they know their work has meaning, an increase in productivity occurs. But not only does the quantity of the work go up, but the quality of it does too. Great leaders add purpose to the workplace.

5. Great leaders are confident.

Great leaders are quick decision-makers and problem solvers. They are confident in their ability to think critically and make sound decisions. Even if the end result lands the company in a bind, they own up to the decision and fix whatever discrepancy has been made to turn the company around. This comes with being assured of themselves and using wise judgment in all of their affairs.

6. Great leaders are servant-leaders.

Above all else, great leaders are humble enough to get down in the trenches with other employees and do the work it takes to meet the demands of the company’s consumers. It’s not all about being demanding. If someone is out, they take up the slack. They make sure if no one else does it, they will do so gladly. They are not too high to do manual labor and actually love to work alongside others. It’s a great teaching tool to lead by example.

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وَمَنْ أَرَادَ الْآخِرَةَ وَسَعَىٰ لَهَا سَعْيَهَا وَهُوَ مُؤْمِنٌ فَأُولَٰئِكَ كَانَ سَعْيُهُم مَّشْكُورًا

 {But whoever desires the Hereafter and exerts the effort due to it while he is a believer - it is those whose effort is ever appreciated [by Allaah].} (Al-Israa', [017]: 019)

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To be a productive, dynamic Muslim, it is extremely important that we inculcate a mindset of positivity. A mindset of positivity leads to a productivity and eventually leads to creating a productive life. If the mindset of positivity is missing, and we are negative and self loathing, and have no hope, do you ever think we would have the enthusiasm to do things and be productive?

I decided to write on negative self-talk, since many people complain that they have started being organized etc, only to fail in following through. And some people say that they start off with being so productive, only to get down and out again. The root of this problem is negative self talk.

If you're like most people, you engage in negative self talk quiet a bit. In fact, it happens a whole lot more than you realize. Negative talk puts limitations on your life, it drains your energy, and instead of wanting to feel productive, you give up feeling despondent.

One of the greatest secrets to being a productive person is letting go of your negative self-talk, and switching to positivity. Behind that door of negativity, there is a brighter, happier, productive life waiting for you.

Where does the negative thinking come from?

First and foremost, negative talk comes from shaytaan. He is your enemy, though you may not believe it - shaytaan makes you procrastinate and detours you from your mission. He stalls you, puts you off from your mission, and makes you find reasons for why you can't do a certain task and finds every way to sabotage you.

Secondly, being in judging mode all the time is where negative talks stem from. We are always judging ourselves, others, those we know personally and those we don't. We judge everyone, and in turn continuously judge and criticise ourselves (e.g., 'I'm not good enough, I'll never succeed, I hate my life').

It eventually becomes an unconscious habit...that we dont realize we are doing.

Enough is enough

There are wonderful things you want to do with your life, but the negativeness in your mind is deeply rooted in to you and holding you back. The good news is you have the power to switch to a positive mindset! And it is possible and not so difficult!

1) Make Du'aa

Ask Allaah to protect you from shaytaan. The Prophet [p] frequently made the following supplication: 

2) Have a soft compassionate approach.

We need to develop and cultivate a mindset of compassion, which encourages us and motivates us to do more. Have compassion on ourselves instead of continuously criticising and harshly judging ourselves and others. Take note that I am not suggesting a mindset that allows us to be too easy on ourselves and allows us to slack. That is far from my message and that is from shaytaan. I am suggesting a mindset of compassion, where if we fail, we pick ourselves up, and try again. A mindset where we honestly scan our lives, see our faults and make commitments to improve and follow through with improving even when we stumble and make mistakes. A mindset where we talk positively to ourselves and strive to be better. We should never let our negativeness, or anybody else's negativeness stop our worthy purpose and affect our lives. Having this compassion, and hope, sets the wheels in motion to a productive life.

A small child who becomes frustrated while trying to learn, is encouraged with kind words, encouragement and compassion. Critically judging and picking on the child, would stifle his ability to learn, yet by being compassionate and encouraging, he blossoms and becomes more enthusiastic and productive. This is the type of gentleness and compassion you should exercise on yourself and others. Give yourself the highest praise for the smallest bit of progress you have made.

As you integrate this new habit in your life, you will see amazing changes that happen. The less you judge others, the less you will judge yourself.

You need to stop being negative and fuel your life with a compassionate persistance. You need to give up negative self talk today, right now. Get off that coach, pick yourself up, your life is waiting. Have hope in Allaah, have hope in yourself and switch to a positive, proactive mindset. Then Allaah will empower you to reach your goals and help you create for yourself a productive dynamic life.

Remember life is a blank canvas, you have the choice to paint it with beautiful, bright colors; or dead,dull colors. Whatever it is my dear brother/sister, you have the choice!

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It was narrated from 'Abdullah bin 'Amr that the Messenger of Allah (p) said: 

 أَحَبُّ الصِّيَامِ إِلَى اللَّهِ صِيَامُ دَاوُدَ كَانَ يَصُومُ يَوْمًا وَيُفْطِرُ يَوْمًا

وَأَحَبُّ الصَّلاَةِ إِلَى اللَّهِ صَلاَةُ دَاوُدَ كَانَ يَنَامُ نِصْفَ اللَّيْلِ وَيُصَلِّي ثُلُثَهُ وَيَنَامُ سُدُسَهُ"‏

"The most beloved fast to Allah is the fast of Dawud, for he used to fast one day and not the next. And the most beloved of prayer to Allah is the prayer of Dawud; he used to sleep half of the night, pray one-third of the night and sleep one-sixth of the night." (Sunan Ibn Majah, Saheeh)

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Aboo Hurairah [may Allaah be pleased with him] narrated that the Prophet Muhammad [peace be upon him] said:

"Allaah shall raise for this Ummah at the head of every century a man who shall renew (or revive) for it its religion."

[Sunan Abu Dawood, Book 37: Kitab al-Malahim [Battles], Hadeeth Number 4278.]

By Sheikh Tawfique Chowdhury:

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Allaah the Almighty Says (what means):

الْيَوْمَ أَكْمَلْتُ لَكُمْ دِينَكُمْ وَأَتْمَمْتُ عَلَيْكُمْ نِعْمَتِي وَرَضِيتُ لَكُمُ الْإِسْلَامَ دِينًا

 "This day have I perfected your religion for you and completed My favor upon you and have chosen for you Islam as your religion.” [Quran 5:3]

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We live in a world where comfort is the no.1 priority for all; we want the most comfortable homes, most comfortable jobs, most comfortable flights, and most comfortable holidays. We don't want to sweat or work hard, but simply be comfortable. The irony of such quest is that once we achieve such comforts, we become restless, we become bored and we normally either seek new challenges and adventures or go into depression and sadness because we find our life to be meaningless.

Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala) says in the Quran:

لَقَدْ خَلَقْنَا الإِنسَانَ فِي كَبَدٍ

"Verily We have created man into toil and struggle" (Chapter 90, Verse 4).

And although one might take this in the negative sense, but what if our happiness was linked to striving and struggling? A philosopher once said,

"We take no pleasure in existence except when we're striving for something".

I believe that's a universal law.

But what should we strive for? What would be our compass to ensure that we're growing in the right direction? That we're achieving our potential in areas that would benefit us in this life and hereafter? This is where Islam comes in and gives us this direction. Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala) says in the Quran

وَمَا خَلَقْتُ الْجِنَّ وَالإِنسَ إِلاَّ لِيَعْبُدُونِ

"And I created not the jinn and mankind except that they should worship Me" (Chapter 51, Verse 56).

Our happiness is linked to our striving for Jannah and the pleasure of Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala), which encompasses the concept of worship in its widest sense and it never ceases until we die. Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala) says in the Quran:

وَاعْبُدْ رَبَّكَ حَتَّى يَأْتِيَكَ الْيَقِينُ

"And worship your Lord until there comes unto you the certainty (i.e. death)" (Chapter 15, Verse 99).

So why are you struggling? Why do you need to be productive?

The answer: to be happy in this life and hereafter inshaa'Allaah.

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The status of the Muslim woman in Islam is a very noble and lofty one, and her effect is vey great in the life of every Muslim. Indeed, the Muslim woman is the initial teacher in the building of a righteous society, providing she follows the guidance from the Book of Allah and the Sunnah of His Prophet (sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam). Since adherence to the Qur'an and the Sunnah distances every Muslim male or female from being misguided in any matter. The misguidance that the various nations suffer from, the path of Allah the Most Perfect, the Most High, and from what His Prophets and Messengers, may Allah's peace and prayers be upon them all, came with. The Prophet (sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam) said: "I am leaving behind two matters, you will not go astray as long as you cling to them both, the Book of Allah and my Sunnah." [Hasan: Related by Malik in Al-Muwatta (2/899) and Al-Hakim (1/93), from Ibn 'Abbas radhiallahu 'anhu. It was authenticated by Al-Albani in As-Sahihah (no. 1871)]

The great importance of the Muslim woman's role - whether as wife, sister or daughter, and the rights that are due to her and the obligations due from her have been explained in the Noble Qur'an, and further details of this have been explained in the purified Sunnah.

The secret of her importance lies in the tremendous burden and responsibility that is placed upon her, and the difficulties that she has to shoulder. In terms of responsibilities, some of which not even a man can bear. This is why from the most important obligations upon a person is to show gratitude to the mother, and kindness and good companionship with her. And in this matter, she is to be given precedence over and above the father. Allah, the Most High, says:

"And We have enjoined upon man to be dutiful and good to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness upon weakness and hardship upon hardship, and his weaning is in two years. Show gratitude and thanks to Me and to your parents. Unto Me is the final destination." [Al-Qur'an 31:14]

Allah, the Most High, said:

"And We have enjoined upon man to be dutiful and kind to his parents. His mother bears him with hardship, and she brings him forth with hardship. And the bearing and the weaning of him is thirty months." [Al-Qur'an 41:15]

A man came to Allah's Messenger( sallallahu 'alayi wa sallam) said: O Messenger of Allah! Who from amongst mankind warrants the best companionship from me. He replied: "Your mother." The man asked: Then who? So he replied: "Your mother." The man asked: Then who? So the Prophet replied again: "Your mother." The man then asked: Then who? So he replied: "Then your father." [Related by Al-Bukhari (no. 5971) and Muslim (7/2), from Abu Hurayrah]. So this necessitates that the mother is given three times the likes of kindness and good treatment than the father.

As regards the wife, then her effect in making the soul tranquil and serene, has been clearly shown in the noble ayah (verse), in His - the Most High's - saying:

"And from amongst His Signs is this: That He created for you wives from amongst yourselves, so that you may find serenity and tranquility in them, And He has put between you love and compassion. Indeed, in this are signs for those who reflect." [Al-Qur'an 30:21]

Al-Hafidh Ibn Kathir (d. 774H) (rahimahullah) said, whilst explaining the terms mawaddah and rahmah which occur in the above verse. "Al-Mawaddah means love and affection, and ar-rahmah means compassion and pity, since a man takes the hand of a woman either due to his love for her, or because of compassion and pity for her; by giving to her a child from himself ... " [Tafsir Qur'an al-'Adhim (3/439) of Ibn Kathir]

And the unique stance that the Prophet's (sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam) wife Khadijah (radhiallahu 'anha) took, had a huge effect in calming and reassuring Allah's Messenger (sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam), when the angel Jibril ('alayhis-salam) first came to him in the cave of Hira. The Prophet (sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam) returned to Khadijah with the first Revelation and with his heart trembling and beating severely, saying to her, "Cover me! Cover me!" So she covered him until his fear was over, after which he told Khadijah (radhiallahu 'anha) everything that had happened, and said: "I fear that something may happen to me." She said to him: "Never! By Allah! Allah will never disgrace you. You keep good ties with relations, you help the poor and the destitute, you serve your guests generouly and assist those who have been affected with calamities." [Related by Al-Bukhari (1/22) and Muslim (1/139), from the lengthy narration of 'A'ishah (radhiallahu 'anha)]]

And do not forget about 'A'ishah (radhiallahu 'anha) and her immense contribution. Even the eminent Sahabah (Companions) used to take knowledge of Hadith from her, and many of the Sahabiyyat (female Companions) learnt the various rulings pertaining to women's issues from her.

And I have no doubt that my mother (may Allah shower His mercy upon her) had a tremendous effect upon me, and has a great excellence over me, in encouraging me to study, and she assisted me in it. May Allah greatly increase her reward and reward her with the best of rewards for what she did for me. And there is no doubt also, that the house in which there is kindness, gentleness, love and care, with the correct Islamic tarbiyyah (education and cultivation) will greatly affect the man. So he will become, if Allah wills, successful in his affairs and in any matter whether it be seeking knowledge, trading, earning a living, etc. So it is Allah alone that I ask to grant us all success and to guide us all to that which He loves and is pleased with. And may the prayers and peace of Allah be upon our Prophet Muhammad, and upon his Family, his Companions and his followers.

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1. Write down a weekly schedule of the dishes you intend to make – no more stress to think about WHAT you have to cook. Let everyone contribute to the list. It'll make things easier. Note down the groceries required.

2. Simplify cooking. Why do you prepare a breakfast and then a snack for the school and then lunch and then dinner? Can't you combine foods in a creative way?

Prepare stuff that you can cook instantly. Stack away things in the freezer. Boil prawns, prepare shaamis, kababs, fish, etc. and freeze them. They'll be ready to fry. Check out recipes that are easy to do. If chapatis take a long time, try making pancakes or dosas.

Try to reuse the curries. You can perhaps make shorba for dinner and use it again for breakfast. Or freeze it and use it a day later to avoid repetition on the same day.

Simplify, simplify, and simplify cooking. You can still cook delicious food. Work smart, not hard.

3. Managing Time. Can't you finish all your cooking in the morning before the children go to school? Why don't you prepare breakfast and lunch together for example?

Start with the most difficult task of the day and finish it off early, because if you are able to get it done in the morning, the rest of the day will be much, much easier. Your major battle for the day is already over.

A sweating walk, jog or exercise and reciting the Qur'an or the Adhkaar after you've exhausted yourself with the morning work will be good to your brain. It will relax you. Think of different activities you can be involved in. Find a friend to do these activities together.

Try to get up even earlier than Fajr if you can. I swear this will be excellent. But that means you must sleep early and train your children to sleep early. Eliminate working after Isha.

4. Work. When working outside home, women generally are extremely loyal to the work they are assigned to, like more loyal than the boss. Don't take more work than what you're capable of.

Set priorities in your life and don't compromise over them. Projects, deadlines, and work are always going to be there. We can't devote our life to them.

5. Post Isha Time. You should not get even close to work after Isha. Relax and chill out. Speak to your family. Spend time talking random stuff. General stuff. Joke with each other. Tell them what happened at home. Hear their stories.

This should be your important and unavoidable family time. Keep it for about half an hour or 45 minutes — that's quality time spent. Then go to sleep by doing your adhkar.

If you wish, write down what you have to do next morning, even if it is the same schedule. Or else, write the schedule i.e. plan the day when you wake up in the morning. But write it down.

6. Involve Children. Many mothers are always in the "do it all" mode.

Get your children involved in housework! Let them do the dishes in turns. If they aren't doing it properly, have Sabr. They will learn. But it must be their responsibility. Period.

You must develop the art of sweetly getting the work done through others. They should love doing it. It should be given that, after dinner, it is they who will clean up the table and do the dishes. Let them also prepare the dinner table and unpack and wash their lunch boxes.

You must be firm. Tell your children that you are finding it very difficult. Express the pressure you are facing and tell them that if they don't help out, you may fall sick. Children will get worried and become responsible. Keep the communication alive.

Publicly appreciate the work they do and encourage them to do more. Treat them as if they are elders. Make housework something interesting to do and a competition between children.

7. Be Fully Involved in what you do (i.e. don't think of other things when you're doing one thing). For example, when you are helping with the homework, think only about that. Innovate on how you could make it easier and better for the children. Make it full of life and activity.

This will help you as well. It will distract you from worries. It will add different colors to your life.

8. Be Positive. Make lots of du'a and leave your worries to Allaah. Please don't get into a self-pity or self-blame mode. Get rid of all negative emotions. They don't help. You can be positive, happy and upbeat regardless of what you have, or don't have in life. Once you've made du'a, expressed your weakness and sought comfort from Allah, you should be in action mode. Think about how to deal with this situation and then plan things.

Work out clever and pleasing ways to give da'wah to your husband. Ways that are not confronting. Be fully obedient, but that doesn't mean you should be dull and silent.

Be confident and expressive in a nice and loving way. Men like women who charm them with positivity (even if he's not giving you the reason to be, but this shouldn't be dependent on him).

Just the state of being positive and giving Da'wah for Allah's sake will make you happy and he'll listen to you more as well In-shaa' Allaah.

Remember that things don't change overnight. Take it step by step. It requires some effort from you. 

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Our self esteem is instilled in us during our youth. Being constantly criticized by family, friends, and society tends to slowly strip us of our feelings of self worth. Our low self esteem strips us of our self confidence to make even the smallest of decisions. Improving your self esteem increases your confidence and is a first step towards finding happiness and a better life.

Allaah Almighty says in the Noble Qur'aan:

إِنَّ أَكْرَمَكُمْ عِندَ اللَّهِ أَتْقَاكُمْ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّهَ عَلِيمٌ خَبِيرٌ

{Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you.

Indeed, Allah is Knowing and Acquainted.} (Al-Hujuraat, Verse 13)

1. Dress nicely without extravagancy. No one is more conscious of your physical appearance than you are. When you don't look good, it changes the way you carry yourself and interact with other people. This doesn't mean you need to spend a lot of money and time on clothes. One great rule to follow is "spend twice as much, buy half as much". Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many select, good quality items. Find things that you like and in return, you will like the way you look. Although you must remember to always remain humble and not extravagant.

إِنَّهُ ۥ لَا يُحِبُّ ٱلۡمُسۡرِفِينَ

"Certainly He (Allah) likes not the extravagant." (7:31)

The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said one day in his khutbah:

"Allaah has revealed to me that you should be humble so that no one will boast to anyone else and no one will transgress against anyone else." (Muslim)

2Have good hygiene. Take care of your personal appearance. In most cases, significant improvements can be made by bathing and removing unwanted body hair frequently (excluding eyebrows and without resembling men) by epilating or waxing (exfoliating is a must!), wearing clean clothes and brushing your teeth twice a day. Although alway remember: nothing beats Miswaak.

The Prophet  ﷺ said: "Had I not feared burdening my Ummah (followers), I would have commanded them to use Siwaak before every Salaat." (Reported by Maalik, Ahmad and an-Nasaa'i.)

"From the acts of nature are five: circumcision (obligation for men, but not for women), removing pubic hairs, trimming the mustache, cutting the nails and plucking the hair from under the armpits." (Recorded by al-Bukhari and Muslim).

It is not allowed to leave them for more than forty nights. This is based on the Hadith of Anas (may Allaah be pleased with him) who said, "The Messenger of Allaah set a time limit for us for trimming the mustache, trimming nails, removing armpit hairs and removing pubic hairs. They cannot be left for more than forty nights." [Recorded by Muslim].

Abdullaah ibn Masood (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah ﷺ say: "Allaah has cursed the woman who does tattoos and the one who has them done, the woman who plucks eyebrows and the one who has it done, and the one who files her teeth for the purpose of beauty, altering the creation of Allaah." (Bukhaari, Muslim)

3Practice good posture, without being arrogant. People with slumped shoulders and lethargic movements display a lack of self confidence. They often are unenthusiastic and don't consider themselves important. By practicing good posture, you'll automatically feel more confident. Stand up straight, keep your head up, and make eye contact. You'll make a positive impression on others and instantly feel more alert and empowered. But remember,

 إن ٱللَّهَ لَا يُحِبُّ ٱلۡمُعۡتَدِينَ

{Truly, Allah likes not the transgressors.} (2:190)

 إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ لَا يُحِبُّ كُلَّ مُخۡتَالٍ۬ فَخُورٍ۬

{Verily, Allah likes not any arrogant boaster.} (31:18)

4Work out regularly and eat the right foods. Physical fitness has a huge effect on self confidence. If you're out of shape, you'll feel insecure and unattractive. By working out, you improve your physical appearance and do something constructive with your time. If you work out in the morning, it also creates positive momentum that you can build on the rest of the day.

'Aa'ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said, "I raced with the Prophet and I beat him. Later when I had put on some weight, we raced again and he won. Then he said, 'this cancels that (referring to the previous race).'" (Saheeh Al-Bukhari)

Muhammad ﷺ said, "Any action without the remembrance of Allaah is either a diversion or heedlessness, except four acts: Walking from target to target [during archery practice], training a horse, playing with one's family, and learning to swim." (At-Tabaraani)

Islaam's holistic approach to health includes treating our bodies with respect and nourishing them with, not only faith, but also with lawful, nutritious food. A major part of living life according to the Creator's instructions is implementing a suitable diet. Choosing wholesome food and avoiding the unwholesome is essential to good health. Allaah Almighty says in the Qur'aan,

كُلُوا مِن طَيِّبَاتِ مَا رَزَقْنَاكُمْ

{Eat of the good things which We have provided for you.} (Quran 2:173)

كُلُوا مِمَّا فِي الْأَرْضِ حَلَالًا طَيِّبًا

{Eat of what is lawful and wholesome on the earth.} (Quran 2:168)

5Give back to others. Volunteer in the Muslim community. This will increase your self esteem.

 وَلْتَكُن مِّنكُمْ أُمَّةٌ يَدْعُونَ إِلَى الْخَيْرِ وَيَأْمُرُونَ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ وَيَنْهَوْنَ عَنِ الْمُنكَرِ ۚ وَأُولَٰئِكَ هُمُ الْمُفْلِحُونَ

{Let there arise out of you a group of people inviting to all that is good, enjoining Al-Ma'roof (i.e. Islamic Monotheism and all that Islam orders one to do) and forbidding Al-Munkar (polytheism and disbelief and all that Islam has forbidden). And it is they who are the successful.} (Surah Aal 'Imraan:104)

Zaid ibn Thabit narrated the Prophet ﷺ said: "May Allah cause to have freshness and brilliance the man who hears what I say and keeps it in mind, then convey it to others." (Ahmad, 5-183.)

Too Much of an Introvert?

1Compliment others modestly. Break the cycle of negativity by praising people when praise is due unexcessively. In the process, you'll become well liked and it will build your self confidence. By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.

Muhammad ﷺ said: "Do not abuse anyone...Do not look down upon any good work, and when you speak to your brother, show him a cheerful face." (Sunan of Abu-Dawood, Hadith 1889)

Muhammad ﷺ said: "Charity is prescribed for each descendant of Adam every day the sun rises." He was then asked: "From what do we give charity every day?" The Prophet answered: "The doors of goodness are many...enjoining good, forbidding evil, removing harm from the road, listening to the deaf, leading the blind, guiding one to the object of his need, hurrying with the strength of one's legs to one in sorrow who is asking for help, and supporting the feeble with the strength of one's arms–all of these are charity prescribed for you." He also said: "Your smile for your brother is charity." (Fiqh-us-Sunnah, Volume 3, Number 98.)

2Sit in the front row. Most people prefer the back of a classroom or office because they're afraid of being noticed. This reflects a lack of self confidence. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over this irrational fear and build your self confidence. You'll also be more visible to the important people talking from the front of the room.

3Speak up. Many people never speak up because they're afraid that people will judge them or think of them negatively. The simple fact is that these are fears everyone experiences. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you'll become a better public speaker, more confident in your own thoughts and recognized as a leader by your peers. One shouldn't fear to speak good words, speak up for that which is right and rewarding.

4Walk faster. You don't have to power walk at all times, but people with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go and things to do. Even if you aren't in a hurry, you can increase your self confidence by doing this because you will look and feel more important.

Remove Your Negative Self-Esteem

1Start from within. Ignore any and all destructive criticism or insults, including any from your past. Your opinion of yourself is the most important opinion of all, because you know yourself better than anyone else. Many of us have been hurt by others at some time. It is crucial not to internalize that abuse and let them continue to hurt us, because that means the other person wins. If we let go of the past, ignore hurtful negativity and make ourselves happy, then we win.

The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said, "Indeed amazing are the affairs of a believer! They are all for his benefit. If he is granted ease then he is thankful, and this is good for him. And if he is afflicted with a hardship, he perseveres, and this is good for him." (Muslim)

And: "Whenever a Muslim is afflicted by harm from sickness or other matters, Allaah will expiate his sins, like leaves drop from a tree." (Bukhari and Muslim)

2Create daily affirmations. Make a list of all the things you like about yourself and another for things you can work on. Thank Allaah for the good and ask his forgiveness and help from the bad.

{And when your Lord proclaimed, "If you give thanks, I will give you more; but if you are thankless, lo!  My punishment is dire.} (Quran 14:7)

If you've made mistakes that prevent you from believing that you deserve to be happy, take measures to relieve that guilt. Apologize to people you may have hurt (if possible), learn from those mistakes and forgive yourself. Use the Qur'aan as your ultimate guide through this learning process.

{O mankind! There has come to you a good advice from your Lord (i.e. the Qur'aan), and a healing for that which is in your hearts.} (Quran 10:57)

{And We send down from the Quran that which is a healing and a mercy to those who believe...} (Quran 17:82)

From the Ahaadeeth of Muhammad ﷺ comes the story of the man whom the Prophet ﷺ sent on a mission.  He camped close by to some people who did not show him any hospitality.  When the leader of the nearby camp was bitten by a snake, they went to Prophet Muhammad's ﷺ companion for help.  He recited the opening chapter of the Qur'aan over the afflicted man and he arose "as if released from a chain" (Saheeh Al-Bukhaari)

3Start with small steps to gain confidence. Take small steps and make small choices to gain confidence in your ability to make a decision.

The Prophet ﷺ said: "There is no disease that Allaah Almighty has created, except that He also has created its treatment." (Saheeh Al-Bukhari)

As you become secure in your ability to make good choices, you will gain confidence in yourself, and be more secure about your abilities in general.

For example, if purchasing jeans makes you anxious because of the plethora of brands, colors, and styles, then just go with your instincts. Trust yourself and go with whatever feels right to you. And if you really feel you made a wrong decision in retrospect, the situation can be easily rectified by exchanging the jeans.

4Don't always try to please others. It is great to be considerate of others, but think before sacrificing your own needs to please them. Bending over backwards for strangers, mere acquaintances or people you don't trust may leave you with the short end of the stick. In short, don't allow yourself to be used.

The Prophet ﷺ said: "Whoever seeks people's contentment by angering Allaah, Allaah will leave his matters for the people." (At-Tirmidhi)

5Be your own person. Don't try to copy anyone else. You will be at your best when you are being yourself because of your uniqueness. Strive to be your best and do not criticize yourself if you fall short of your expectations.

6Avoid negative people. People who have a negative attitude which may rub off on you are not good for you. If you're timid, loud and aggressive people are probably not good for you, and vice versa. Whatever you do, do not compare yourself to others. Just be the best that you can be.

The Prophet ﷺ said, "The case of the good companion and the bad companion is like that of the seller of musk and the blower of the bellows (iron-smith). As for the seller of musk, he will either give you some of the musk, or you will purchase some from him, or at least you will come away having experienced its good smell. Whereas the blower of the bellows will either burn your clothing, or at least you will come away having experienced its repugnant smell." [Al-Bukhaari and Muslim]

7Face your fears and learn from your failures. We only fail when we do not make the best out of adversity. When something doesn't go the way we would like it to, there is something to be learned from that, which can be applied next time you are in a similar situation. Get up and try again.

Repentance (Tawbah) is a spiritual necessity in Islaam. As humans, who are not infallible, we will commit sins, and we will make mistakes, even with good intentions.

There can be no sincere making of tawbah for any sin or mistake without self-actualization, meaning that we have to first be aware that we are fallible beings, who need to take constant calculation of our intentions, thought processes and actions. The Qur'aan states (59:19),

{And be not like those who forgot Allaah, so He allowed them to forget themselves; these it is who are the transgressors.} (59:19)

If we have knowledge of self, then it enables us to see our wrongdoing, which leads towards a feeling of remorse within us if we are connected to our souls. There cannot be true tawbah without having remorse. In fact, Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated, "Remorse is repentance." (Ibn Majah & Ahmad)

8Stop the negative thoughts. Try positive thinking on for size. If you constantly tell yourself you are stupid or that you will never achieve success, you will in turn act as such. Improve what's within yourself, have pure thoughts and aim for your Deen, and you will see a change within youself.

وَعِندَهُ مَفَاتِحُ الْغَيْبِ لَا يَعْلَمُهَا إِلَّا هُوَ ۚ وَيَعْلَمُ مَا فِي الْبَرِّ وَالْبَحْرِ ۚ وَمَا تَسْقُطُ مِن وَرَقَةٍ إِلَّا يَعْلَمُهَا 

وَلَا حَبَّةٍ فِي ظُلُمَاتِ الْأَرْضِ وَلَا رَطْبٍ وَلَا يَابِسٍ إِلَّا فِي كِتَابٍ مُّبِينٍ

{And with Him are the keys of the unseen; no one knows them except Him. And He knows what is on the land and in the sea. Not a leaf falls but that He knows it. And no grain is there within the darknesses of the earth and no moist or dry [thing] but that is [written] in a clear record.} (Quran 6:59)

9Don't worry about being "perfect." Aiming for perfection in life is a lost cause because the term means different things to different people. Nobody is perfect in the eyes of everyone else. Instead, seek to achieve goals and know that Allaah alone is perfect.

10Learn to appreciate yourself. Everyone has strengths, weaknesses, habits, and principles that define who you are and can make you distinctive. Spend more time focusing on the qualities about yourself that you like and that are praiseworthy in the Deen. You can better accomplish this by taking up hobbies and projects that you can do which will make use of your strengths. Additionally, by starting on some projects that emphasize your good traits, it will keep you busy so you will end up spending less time thinking about your weaknesses.

11Reward yourself when you succeed. Treat yourself to something nice in the glow of your successes. Believe in yourself as a Musim and others will also believe and trust in you. The best thing you can reward yourself with is an extra prostration (Sajdah) infront of your Lord.

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Concerning this point, Satan has many ways and means. It is recorded in Sahih al-Bukhaari that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “During your sleep, Satan ties three knots at the back of your necks. He breathes the following into them, ‘The night is long so keep on sleeping.’ If the person wakes and praises Allah, then one of the knots is unfastened. And if he performs ablution, the second knot is unfastened. When he prays, all of the knots are unfastened. After that he will be energetic and happy in the morning. Otherwise he would get up listless and grouchy.”

It is also recorded in Sahih al-Bukhaari and Sahih Muslim that he said, “When one of you rises from your sleep he should make ablution. He should rinse his nose three times. For Satan stays in the upper part of one’s nose during the night.”

Al-Bukhaari also records that the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked about a man who sleeps until the morning comes, that is, after the time of the dawn prayer. He said, “That is a man whom Satan has urinated into his two ears.”

What we have mentioned is from among the ways that Satan hinders the human from doing some actions. He also whispers into the human a love for laziness, postponing or procrastinating actions and thinking about what a long period of time one has for such and such action or work.

Ibn al-Jawzi has written on this topic, stating that many of the Jews or Christians actually felt and feel in their hearts love for Islaam but Iblees continues to hinder them. He says to them, “Do not be hasty. Look closer into the matter.” And they postpone their conversion until they die as disbelievers.

In the same way, the one who is disobedient to Allaah postpones his repentance. He sets his sights on his desires and he hopes he will repent later. But, as the poet said, “Do not rush to perform the sins you desire and think about the period of repentance beforehand.”

How many are determined to do something and then they postpone it. Perhaps a scholar is determined to return to his study. Satan says, “Rest for a while.” Or a servant is alerted to the prayer at night and he says to him, “You have plenty of time.” He will not stop making people love laziness and postponing of actions and he makes the person rely on hopes and dreams.

It is necessary for the energetic person to take matters into his own hand and act upon his energy. The energetic finds the time to do things and does not procrastinate and he turns away from just dreaming. The one who has a real fear of Allah does not feel safe of punishment. The soul never stops in its dispute about evil and facing the good. But it always expects that it will have plenty of time to complete the good. One of the early scholars said,

“Beware of procrastinating. It is the greatest of the soldiers of Satan.”

The serious, non-procrastinating person and the one who rests on his hopes and puts off working are like two who are passing through a city while journeying. The serious, energetic one buys his provisions early and waits for his traveling out of the city. The procrastinator says, “I will wait, as perhaps we will stay here a month,” and continues to put off buying his provisions and preparing for his departure, until the last minute wherein he becomes rushed and mistake prone.

This is how people are in this world. Some of them are prepared and alert. When the angel of death comes, he is not sorrowful. Others are deceived by thinking they can procrastinate and they will despair when the time to move on comes. It is part of one’s nature to love laziness and dreams but then Iblees comes and builds upon that. This makes it difficult to struggle against him in that matter.

But the one who is alert knows that he is in the middle of a battle.

He knows that his enemy does not rest.

And if it seems that he is resting, it is actually just part of his strategy.

Source: Excerpted from: The World of the Jinn and Devils,. Chapter: From the Ways of Satan in Leading Humans Astray By Dr.Umar Al-Ashqar. Adapted from the book Ibn al-Jawzi, Talbees Iblees, p. 458.

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Sometimes, it is the case that Allah opens up a person’s heart and sparks it with zeal, motivation, determination and He gives it a burst of enthusiasm. He blesses his slaves with high aspirations and drives them towards good deeds until… Shaytan recognises this tremendous gift and he in turn rushes to stop such a well-driven believer. He launches his army against him, but then Allah `azza wa jall by His Mercy and Power protects His slave and helps him overcome the plots of Shaytan;

“Indeed My Slaves, you have no authority over them, except those who follow you of the deviators.” [al-Hijr: 42]

And so the slave of Allah is forever in a battle; between fighting the grip of Shaytan and between hastening onwards to achieve his goals and aspirations.

We have to learn to recognize this pattern that often occurs the moment we make an intention to do something good in our lives; something that’s worthwhile and rewarding, or has great weight in the Hereafter. For some, this battle begins the moment they enter into Islaam, for others the battle kicks off when they make a firm resolve to achieve something (e.g. seeking knowledge, or learning Qur’an, or setting up community projects etc).

One of the crazy plots of Shaytan is that he often seeks to harm us through the people that surround us or people that are close to us. Subhaan’Allah how often we hear of youth suffering at the hands of their (non-practising/non-Muslim) parents who restrict them from practicing their Islaam, or a person who wishes to embark on some good but his friends are the first people to put him down or demotivate him, or laymen who are turned away at the doors of knowledge unfairly such that they’re made to feel rejected, or a worshipper who is rebuked harshly by another such that his drive in worshipping Allah is now broken. Yes, harms can often reach you from those around you; sometimes it’s people that you couldn’t care less about, sometimes it’s those above you in authority, and sometimes, just sometimes, it’s those that mean the world to you.

As part of a lifelong tarbiyyah, we have to recognize that this is not uncommon in the path of struggling towards Allah and His Pleasure. Many scholars have written books on it and classical texts such as Ibn Hibban’s ‘Rawdhat al-‘Uqala’ have numerous chapters dedicated to this. Yes, even though you will meet good companions in life who help you and offer you kind words of encouragement, there are times unfortunately when you will also face people (often at the peak of your enthusiasm) who intentionally or unintentionally bring you down, discourage you, or zap all your zeal and passion in one way or another. As a result, a person ends up either not fulfilling their potential, or they become weak in their pursuit of the good deed, or they abandon it altogether. We have to recognize that this is just another tool of Shaytan to prevent the slave of Allah from attaining the high ranks in Paradise.

How can a person best deal with this?

Focus on Allah, your Creator. He is the One who wishes to see you succeed. He is the One who wants good for you, and His Help is with you so long as you are sincere and do your best.

Focus on the Hereafter and make it your focal point throughout life. Fix your vision on attaining the high ranks; “Look at how We have favoured some of them over others, but the Hereafter is greater in degrees and greater in distinction.” [Al-Israa': 21].

Ask Allah for guidance in all your affairs. Seek His Mercy and Blessings. Ask Him to help you overcome the obstacles in life and help you deal with people in the best manner, and Inshaa’Allah He will most certainly bring you out as a stronger, wiser person.

Be patient. Be patient with people, with circumstances, with the era you live in. Be patient when things don’t go smoothly or even if they do go smoothly, be patient when they don’t turn out as you expect.

Realise that sometimes people are just part of the test. They may not always intend you harm, but it’s the Decree of Allah that He may wish to test you with others. In the end, this will only increase your reliance upon Him and your heart will learn to be patient with everything and seek Him Alone.

Remain humble. It’s all too easy to improperly react (or overreact!) when faced with difficult people. Be calm, be collected and stay humble. We ourselves are not safe from mistreating others which is likely to happen if we respond with anger or speak without thought.

If you endure harm from one person, don’t let it cause you to abandon others. Be social but be wiser in your sociability. Remember the words of Ibn Hibban when he said,

“Whoever seeks to please all people is seeking something impossible! Rather, the intelligent one seeks the pleasure of those who he cannot do without… Many times there is little safety for a person when he is social, so what safety can there be for a person who is unsocial?”

In other words, when you’re social, at least there’ll be people who like you and you like them, but if you’re unsocial, then you won’t be liked by anyone.

Remember your high aspirations. Remember that they are worth the struggle because you have intended them for Allah. Keep looking forwards, and don’t be sidetracked by the difficulties. As the great thinker and reformer once said:

“My brother, walk on, and do not look back,

Your path has been dyed with blood (i.e. struggles).

Do not look about, neither here nor there,

And do not look except to the sky…”

- Sayyid Qutb (rahimahullah)

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Excellence in measured in many ways, one of the most important of which is your confidence and ability to stay on your chosen path. You will find when you do that, that other people will often be scared of your high ideals and goals. To remain on the path and not be discouraged by their lack of confidence is a measure of excellence. I have always measured the strength of my goals from the number of people who they scare the daylights out of. Currently the same is true for my dream of the SBA - it scares the daylights out of a lot of people. To me, it means that I am on the right path. You see, the only path that doesn’t scare the sheep is the path to the pen. I personally have never had a liking to being penned. Especially since every pen has two doors. One towards the pasture and the other towards the abattoir.

Danger is both exciting as well as mostly imaginary. But when we embark on lofty goals which are rooted in integrity, truthfulness and the desire to do something worthwhile, the world - what we know of it as well as what is unseen - conspires to make us succeed. Angels walk with you though you can't see them. Doors open for you where you would not have imagined. People come out of the woodwork to help you not because you asked them to - you didn’t even know that they were there - but because they were sent. The resources that you need to accomplish your goal will flow in your direction.

Very simple principle of physics - water flows down a slope, not up it. So when you are climbing a hill and rain falls, water will flow in your direction. If you are running away and going downhill, water will flow away from you. Your position on the hill doesn’t matter (no matter how far from the peak you are). It is your direction which makes a world of difference and quite simply spells the difference between reaching the peak or not. Many people believe that they can climb a mountain walking backwards. I personally don’t know of anyone who managed to do that. If you want to succeed, you have to face your fears and stare into their eyes until they look away. Not turn your back on them. Especially because what is behind your back becomes even more scary. I was never very good at walking backwards myself.

That is not to say that one must ignore honest feedback or not check one's assumptions against emerging data and change them if necessary. That too is a measure of excellence in itself (see Rasoolullah (SAS)'s conduct in Badr when he agreed to camp in a different place) but the final goal must not be watered down and diluted because of fear. One is to change the approach because someone has a better way. That is good to do provided that other way stands the test of rigorous proof-of-concept. The other is to give up the goal itself because you became afraid. That is to betray yourself.

Remember that we all start in the same place - as idealists. But then we allow others (at least most of us do) to dictate what we will do, how we will live, what goals are 'realistic', what goals are 'worth it' and so on. So the leaping flame of idealism that was in our heart takes a beating and gradually gets reduced and dampened.

When you are idealistic people will initially oppose you and push back and try to discourage you, not because they don’t like what you are planning to do but because in your eyes they see what they were themselves like one day; until they allowed the rest of the crowd to dampen their idealism. But remember also that the spark of idealism lives as long as we are alive. You can dampen it but you can't kill it. So when they meet you, their spark starts to get some energy and that scares them. Their initial reaction is to try to put it back in its 'place' and dampen it once again because that will justify what they did to themselves all their lives. But if you refuse to internalize their fears and are true to your ideals, you will see that their own sparks will start to grow and will once again become the leaping flames that dispel the fears of darkness and light up the world in ways that neither they nor you thought possible.

The key is to remain true to your ideals no matter what the world tells you. That, to me, is a measure of excellence.

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Concerning this point, Satan has many ways and means. It is recorded in Sahih al-Bukhari that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

"During your sleep, Satan ties three knots at the back of your necks. He breathes the following into them: 'The night is long so keep on sleeping.' If the person wakes and praises Allah, then one of the knots is unfastened. And if he performs ablution, the second knot is unfastened. When he prays, all of the knots are unfastened. After that he will be energetic and happy in the morning. Otherwise he would get up listless and grouchy."

It is also recorded in Sahih al-Bukhari and Sahih Muslim that he said,

"When one of you rises from your sleep he should make ablution. He should rinse his nose three times. For Satan stays in the upper part of one's nose during the night."

Al-Bukhari also records that the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked about a man who sleeps until the morning comes, that is, after the time of the dawn prayer. He said,

"That is a man whom Satan has urinated into his two ears."

What we have mentioned is from among the ways that Satan hinders the human from doing some actions. He also whispers into the human a love for laziness, postponing or procrastinating actions and thinking about what a long period of time one has for such and such action or work. Ibn al-Jawzi has written on this topic, stating:

How many of the Jews or Christians have considered in their hearts love for Islam. But Iblees always hinders them. He says to them, "Do not be hasty. Look closer into the matter."And they postpone their conversion until they die as unbelievers. In the same way the one who is disobedient to Allah postpones his repentance. He sets his sights on his desires and he hopes he will repent later. But, as the poet said,

How many are determined to do something and then they postpone it. Perhaps a scholar is determined to return to his study. Satan says, "Rest for a while." Or a servant is alerted to the prayer at night and he says to him, "You have plenty of time." He will not stop making people love laziness and postponing of actions and he makes the person rely on hopes and dreams.

It is necessary for the energetic person to take matters into his own hand and act upon his energy. The energetic finds the time to do things and does not procrastinate and he turns away from just dreaming. The one who has a real fear of Allah does not feel safe of punishment. The soul never stops in its dispute about evil and facing the good. But it always expects that it will have plenty of time to complete the good. One of the early scholars said,

"Beware of procrastinating. It is the greatest of the soldiers of Satan."

The serious, non-procrastinating person and the one who rests on his hopes and puts off working are like two who are passing through a city while journeying. The serious, energetic one buys his provisions early and waits for his journey out of the city. The procrastinator says, "I will wait, as perhaps we will stay here a month," and continues to put off buying his provisions and preparing for his departure, until the last minute wherein he becomes rushed and mistake prone. This is how people are in this world. Some of them are prepared and alert. When the angel of death comes, he is not sorrowful. Others are deceived by thinking they can procrastinate and they will despair when the time to move on comes.

It is part of one’s nature to love laziness and dreams but then Iblees comes and builds upon that. This makes it difficult to struggle against him in that matter. But the one who is alert knows that he is in the middle of a battle. He knows that his enemy does not rest. And if it seems that he is resting, it is actually just part of his strategy.

Source: Ibn al-Jawzi, Talbees Iblees, p. 458.

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“By the night when it covers,

And by the day when it appears,

And by He who created the male and the female,

Indeed, your efforts are diverse.

As for he who gives and fears Allah,

And believes in the best (reward),

We will ease him towards ease,

But as for he who withholds and considers himself free of need,

And denies the best reward,

We will ease him towards difficulty.

And what will his wealth avail him when he falls?

Indeed, (incumbent) upon Us is guidance,

And indeed, to Us belongs the Hereafter and the first (life).

So I have warned you of a blazing Fire,

None will burn therein except the most wretched one,

Who had denied and turned away.

But the righteous one will avoid it:

He who gives from his wealth to purify himself,

And not giving for anyone who has done him a favour to be returned,

But only seeking the Countenance of his Lord, Most High.

And soon he is surely going to be well-satisfied.”

(Surah Al-Lail, Quran 92:1-21)

This Surah (chapter) of the Quran was revealed in relation to a simple but wonderful incident that happened during the lifetime of the Prophet (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam) and was recorded by Ibn Abi Hatim on the authority of Ibn Abbas (radhiallaahu anhu):

There was a Muslim man who owned an orchard full of date palm trees. The branches of one of these trees would overhang into the premises of a poor man and his family. The farmer would frequently come to the poor man’s house in order to gather the dates from this tree but in doing so, a few dates would inadvertently fall onto the floor and be picked up by the children of the poor man. Whenever this would happen, the farmer would quickly descend from the tree and grab the dates from the hands of the poor children. Furthermore, if he caught one of the children having already put a date into his or her mouth, then he would forcefully insert his fingers into their mouths and wrench out the dates.

When this continued for a number of days, the poor man complained to the Prophet (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam) about it. The Prophet (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam) met the farmer and offered him a deal. He (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam) said: “Give me your date palm tree whose branches overhang into the courtyard of so-and-so and in return I will guarantee you a date palm tree in Paradise.”

However the farmer replied to the Prophet (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam)): “I would have given it to you but the thing is that out of all the many date palm trees that I have, none produces dates as good as this one.” He then went away.

Immediately after, the Prophet (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam) was approached by a man who had overheard his (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam) conversation with the farmer. He asked the Prophet (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam): “Would you offer me the same deal as you offered that man, O Messenger of Allah?”

“Yes” replied the Prophet (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam).

Therefore the man, who owned many date palms of his own, went to the farmer and said to him: “The Prophet (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam) has offered me a date palm in Paradise in return for the date-palm of yours that overhangs into the courtyard of so-and-so.”

The farmer replied, “I would have given it to him (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam) but the thing is that out of all the many date palms that I have, none produces dates as good as this tree.”

“Are you willing to sell it?” the man asked.

“No, except if I receive for it whatever price I ask, but I do not think that anyone will pay that much for it,” replied the farmer.

“So how much do you want for it?” asked the man.

“40 date palm trees,” the farmer replied.

“40 date palms just for this one tree? You are asking for a huge price!” the man exclaimed. He then fell silent for a few moments after which he added, “Ok. I will pay you 40 date palms, so sign a contract with me if you mean what you say.” The farmer called some witnesses and they concluded the sale, so the man then went to the Prophet (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam) and said, “O Messenger of Allah! I have purchased that date palm from the farmer and now it is all yours.”

The Prophet (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam) in turn went to the poor man and said to him:

"That date palm now belongs to you and your family!...” Then Allah the Exalted sent down from above the Seven Heavens, “By the night when it covers,” to the end of the Surah.

Allah is Great!

How deprived was the wretched farmer to refuse the guarantee of a place in Paradise (you cannot be guaranteed a tree in Paradise without actually being there yourself to enjoy it) in exchange for a paltry date palm tree? And how blessed was the other man who bought himself a place in Paradise by paying only 41 date palm trees? This man saw an opportunity to do a good deed that would admit him to Paradise, so he immediately seized the moment. Had he hesitated, or delayed the matter to think about it, he might have missed the opportunity and someone else could have seized it instead.

Abu Bakr (radhiallaahu anhu) encountered many such opportunities and he grabbed every single one of them. When he saw Bilal (radhiallaahu anhu), the black slave, being tortured by Umayyah bin Khalaf, he immediately bought him from Umayyah and freed him. Abu Bakr (radhiallaahu anhu) did this with many Muslim slaves who were being oppressed in Makkah because they had no tribe or family to protect them: he bought them and freed them. When Abu Bakr’s father saw him doing this, he said: “My son, why are you buying these weak slaves then freeing them? Why don’t you at least keep them so that you can make use out of them?”

Abu Bakr replied to his father:

“My father, I am only doing this to seek the Countenance (Face) of Allah.”

Allah The Almighty brings as many opportunities every day but how many of us seize them and how many of us belittle and ignore them? How do we not know that perhaps it is one of those opportunities for doing good deeds that will admit us into Paradise?

Indeed, the Prophet (salallaahu 'alayhi wa salam) told us that a man was admitted into Paradise for merely removing a thorny branch from the path of the people; and a prostitute was forgiven for simply giving a thirsty dog some water to drink. And how many people have been admitted to Paradise for freeing a slave or ransoming a captive prisoner?

Never belittle or ignore any good deed, however small or insignificant. Never belittle or ignore any good deed whether it is bringing water to your brother or saying the remembrance supplications after each Salah or helping someone to carry their luggage or smiling in the face of your brother. Or if it is helping to ransom a captive prisoner.

Never belittle or ignore any good deed because that could be the deed that brings you salvation and admits you into Paradise. Scholars said that there should be no hesitation in deeds concerning the Hereafter. Seize the moment today. Before it is too late...

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The status of the Muslim woman in Islaam is a very noble and lofty one, and her effect is very great in the life of every Muslim. Indeed the Muslim woman is the initial teacher in building a righteous society, providing she follows the guidance from the Book of Allaah and the Sunnah of the Messenger (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam). Since adherence to the Qur`aan and the Sunnah distances every Muslim – male or female – from being misguided in any matter. The misguidance that the various nations suffer from, and their being deviated does not come about except by being far away from the path of Allaah – the Most Perfect, the Most High – and from what His Prophets and Messngers - may Allaah’s Peace and Prayers be upon them all – came with.

The Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said: "I am leaving behind you two matters, you will not go astray as long as you cling to them both, the Book of Allaah and my Sunnah." [2]

The great importance of the Muslim woman’s role – whether as wife, sister, or daughter, and the rights that are due to her and the rights that are due from her – have been explained in the noble Qur`aan, and further detailed of this have been explained in the purified Sunnah.

The secret of her importance lies in the tremendous burden and responsibility that is placed upon her, and the difficulties she has to shoulder – responsibilities and difficilties some of which not even a man bears. This is why from the most important obligations upon a person is to show gratitude to the mother, and kindness and good companionship with her. And in this matter, she is to be given precedence over and above the father. Allaah the Exalted says:

"And We have enjoined upon man to be good and dutiful to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness upon weakness and hardship upon hardship, and his weaning is in two years. Show gratitude and thanks to Me and to your parents. Unto Me is the final destination." [Soorah Luqmaan 31:14]

Allaah the Exalted said:

"And We have enjoined upon man to be dutiful and kind to his parents. His mother bears him with hardship, and she brings him forth with hardship. And the bearing and weaning of him is thirty months." [Sooratul Ahqaaf 41:15]

A man came to the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) and said: "O Messenger of Allaah! Who from amongst mankind warrents the best companionship from me?" He replied: "Your mother."

The man asked, "Then who?" So he replied: "Your mother."

The man then asked, "Then who?" So the Prophet replied again: "Your mother."

Then the man asked, "Then who?" So he replied: "Your father." [3]

So this necessitates that the mother is given three times the likes of kindness and good treatment than the father.

As regards the wife, then her status and her effect in making the soul tranquil and serene has been clearly shown in the noble aayah (statement of Allaah), in His – the Exalted – saying:

"And from His signs is this: That He created for you wives amongst yourselves, so that you may find serentiy and tranquility in them. And He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in this are signs for those who reflect." [Sooratur Room 30:21]

Al-Haafidh Ibn Katheer (d.774H) – rahimahullaah – said whilst explaining the terms muwaddah and rahmah which occur in the above aayah:

"Al-muwaddah means love and affection and ar-rahmah means compassion and pity – since a man takes a woman either due to his love for her, or because of compassion and pity for her; by giving to her a child from himself…" [4]

And the unique stance that the Prophet’s (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) wife Khadeejah – radiyallaahu ‘anhaa – took, had a huge effect in calming and reassuring the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam), when the angel Jibreel (‘alayhis salaam) first came to the cave of Hiraa. So the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) returned to Khadeejah (radiyallaahu ‘anhaa) with the first Revelation and with his heart beating and trembling severely, and he said to her: "Cover me! Cover me!"

So she covered him until his fear was over, after which he told Khadeejah (radiyallaahu ‘anhaa) everything that happened and said: "I fear that something may happen to me."

So she said to him:

"Never! By Allaah! Allaah will never disgrace you. You keep good ties with the relations, you help the poor and the destitute, you serve your guests generously and assist those who have been afflicted with calamities." [5]

And do not forget about ‘Aa`ishah (radiyallaahu ‘anhaa) and her great effect. Since even the great Companions used to take the knowledge of Hadeeth from her, and many of the Sahaabiyaat (female Companions) learned the various rulings pertaining to women’s issues from her.

And I have no doubt that my mother – may Allaah shower His mercy upon her – had a tremendous effect upon me, in encouraging me to study; and she assisted me in it. May Allaah greatly increase her reward and reward her with the best of rewards for what she did for me.

And there is no doubt also, that the house in which there is kindness, gentleness, love and care, along with the correct Islaamic tarbiyah (education and cultivation) will greatly effect the man. So he will become – if Allaah wills – successful in his affairs and in any matter – whether it be seeking knowledge, trading, earning a living, or other than this. So it is Allaah alone that I ask to grant success and to guide us all to that which He loves and is pleased with. And may the Prayers and Peace of Allaah be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon his Family, his Companions and his followers.

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I wanted to share a moving story that I once heard and will always remember and cherish for its meanings. It’s the story of one of the great Imams of this Ummah, Imam Ahmad bin Hanbal.

His son, Abdullah, asked his father one day: “Abi when will we ever relax?” His father, one of the greatest revivers of the Sunnah and a role model for all Muslims, looked him in the eye and said:

“With the first step we take into Jannah.”

Ya Allah, what a beautiful response!

There are days that come to you and you’re tired, you just want to sleep and relax and “shut off” as they say. Those are the days in which you need to ask yourself a critical question: ‘Where am I going with life?’ If it’s towards Allah and for Allah, then regain your strength and continue your work, for Jannah is precious and must be sought. But if you look into your life and realise that it’s not towards Allah but towards Dunya, then your tiredness becomes a blessing, for it is a reminder that you need to change direction and renew your purpose in life.

I love this story on many levels. For one, it shows you that when someone’s focus is Jannah, their priorities change and their outlook on life is different. What we perceive as difficulty, they perceive as ease. What we perceive as calamity, they perceive as reward. What we perceive as obstacles, they perceive as opportunities for sincere dua. Moreover, when your focus is Jannah, this Dunya and its constant demand becomes small and the least of our concerns.

Also, I love the way the son began his question: “Abi” – a sweet way of addressing his father, and asked: “When will we ever relax?” If you notice, he didn’t say, “when will I relax Dad?” Even though he wanted to relax, he wasn’t selfish and also cared for his father’s condition. This also shows you that the father and son were working hard together. Again, when your focus is Jannah it reflects in your family, children, and those around you and everyone gears up towards that goal.

Our problem today is not that we’re tired, our problem today is that we relax too much. We do everything so that we relax. We cheat, break promises, do not fulfill our vows, lie, take and give bribery, and so on. Why? So we can relax. We don’t stay up for Tahajjud or wake up for Fajr, we don’t fast, or go for Hajj and Umrah… all so we can relax. We don’t walk towards the Masjid or open the Book of Allah so we can understand it, all in the name of “I need to relax!”

Dear brothers and sisters, there’s plenty of relaxation where we’re going, but this is not the time for it. Let’s all work for Jannah and be productive in the path of Allah, and work so hard that one day our children will approach us and ask: “Abi” or “Ummi”: “When will we ever relax?” and you can smile and look them in the eyes and say, “When we enter Jannah inshaAllah”.

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{Say: "If you (really) love Allâh then follow me, Allâh will love you and forgive you of your sins.

And Allâh is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful."} (Aal 'Imraan [3]:31)

The sound of this duff is silent and only I know,

That within my heart it beats love with a rhythmical flow,

For as I read the biography of the Rasool I came to know,

That without a doubt he was the last Prophet sent after many in a row.

Yes, his Character was so pure… just like snow,

His shoulders testified so that all would recognize him and know,

That he was the lofty Messenger, sent to mankind as a whole,

Even to the people who had then stooped and even now, stoop so low.

Allah (Almighty) even, by the pointing of the Prophet’s finger, parted the moon,

For a people to witness the truth of this Message which was to spread soon,

Around the world so quickly, like the period between morning and noon!

Sall Allahu ’alyhi Wa Sallam…

They even buried their female children under the earth so low,

Various tribes were full of hatred - to each other a foe,

But he was sent so that we’d worship Allah united in a row,

Although, in spreading his message, we have become so slow,

Disunited, quarreling and in a row.

If only we’d know,

Realize and begin to spread his message and sow,

The seeds of goodness that to us he did show.

Peace and blessings be upon his soul,

For truly his way saves many from the hellfire’s burning, blazing and devouring hole.

From within the sons of Adam his mention has great height,

The skies were lucky to witness his like,

In the world it is rare to witness such a sight,

Let’s learn about his life and hold on to it tight,

For by this we will be following the divine guidance full of light.

Sall Allahu ’alyhi Wa Sallam…

So what is this that so many Muslims are sowing,

Into this deen without thoroughly thinking, studying and researching,

Just blindly following what people are saying,

Without knowledge so many are innovating,

Away from his guidance we are moving,

For, the Sahaabah loved him so much and weren’t into tainting,

The deen of Allah that is to be followed without hesitating.

Whatever is added to our deen - which we refer to as Bid’ah - innovating,

The Prophet clearly said it will be rejected and not accepted.

In fact, on the Day of Judgment the angels will be shoving,

Those who innovated, away from the Kawther, which will be shining and glowing.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) will stand and we will, Allah Willing, see him,

But then, the chance of the innovators drinking from his hands will be dim,

Now’s the time, don’t just hope by wishful thinking that you will win,

On a day when will become apparent each and every sin.

So dear Muslim, please consider,

Whether your actions are in line with the Sunnah,

For we love the Rasool and insha’Allah will meet him sooner or later,

And we both know that none of us is to his way a hater or an objector.

Sall Allahu ’alyhi Wa Sallam…

So, dear Muslim, by Allah! The silent duff continues to beat,

“..Sall Allahu ‘alyhi wa Sallam..”, to the heart so refreshing and sweet,

Desiring the company of the Prophet, and of his Companions, for us to meet,

After the trials and tribulations of this world and its testing heat.

O Allah expand our good deeds even those as small as a grain’s wheat!

Allow us to eat from Paradise’s fruits, so sweet,

Give us, within the highest Paradise, next to the Prophet (peace be upon him) a seat,

In which there will be no pain, no hurt and no deceit.

Nothing will be incomplete or in a boring way repeat,

You’ll walk within its beautiful meadows and enlightened streets,

And there you’ll see the Prophet’s house… from you away now only a few feet,

Joy upon joy, treat upon treat!

Sall Allahu ’alyhi Wa Sallam…

So, today and every day, let’s send our salutations his way,

Especially on the blessed day of Friday,

So that it may reach him without delay,

Thus we’ll be saved from great dismay.

In this way we will gain rewards within each and every passing transient day,

And, Allah Willing, we’ll become more focused and saved from going astray,

Because we’ll be following the Prophet’s say,

And hence allowing his Sunnah to take us away,

From the devil’s deceit which has made so many sway,

From the Straight path and its way.

Sall Allahu ’alyhi Wa Sallam…

You never know…

This repetitive duff, which seems like something small,

May become a barrier, a wall,

Preventing you from hell and its destructive fall.

O Allah forgive us! For surely we must hear either Paradise's or Hell's call,

That’s why we must ask Allah to forgive us all,

And to follow the Prophet’s call,

Each and every one of us... all-in-all.

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Abdullah ibn Al-Mubarak used to often stay at home, so he was asked, "Don’t you get lonely?" He replied,

"How can I get lonely when I am with the Prophet (salla Allahu alayhi wasallam, i.e. I read his hadith)?"

(Ibn ‘Asâkir, Târîkh Dimishq Vol. 32 p458.)

***

Even if I were to spend my whole life,

Fighting off the soul’s strife,

Completing the day-to-day chores of a wife,

But studying the Prophetic Narrations with a heartfelt drive,

By the Will of Allah, the Most Wise,

I’d surely have made the most of my life.

Each time the soul endures,

The painstaking hours by which to adore,

Each word from the ahaadeeth of the Prophet of our Lord,

Allowing each breath and heart beat to run with it in unison and flow,

Pushing away the sadness and worries deep inside below,

By walking into a door,

Not only travelled by me, but also by many of those who lived afore.

I wasn’t given the chance to live in his time,

Nor see the Prophetic seal, the Prophetic Sign,

But I will strive hard to go back in time,

And live those moments through the narrations passed down in line…

Regarding the man who was the last Prophet before the end of time.

Then, just maybe, maybe I will see him,

Allah is All Forgiving, although right now the chances seem dim,

For I have a lot yet to learn and win,

But I hope that I am on the path, even if it’s just virtually on the brim,

Of catching on to something great,

By studying about him and refuting those who hate

His Noble ways, before it’s too late.

O Allah make me not wait,

Till the hereafter to see him, make it in my fate,

That I see him in this life within my dreams,

Beams upon beams, light upon light,

To take away my heart’s plight,

And give me the drive to study, teach, write and cite,

Although I know I’ll never truly fulfil his blessed right.

Even if I were to spend my whole life on this path,

I ask Allah for sincerity, His Pleasure and to save me from His Wrath,

So that although I came from the last,

I hope to be among the first to run into Paradise

….at last.

It was once said to ‘Abdullah b. Al-Mubârak, “O Abû ‘Abd Al-Rahmân, you often sit alone at home.” He said,

“I am alone? I am with the Prophet – Allâh’s peace and blessings be upon him – and his Companions.”

Meaning: reading hadîth. (Ibn ‘Asâkir, Târîkh Dimishq Vol. 32 p458.)

Shaqîq b. Ibrâhîm reports: It was once said to ‘Abdullah b. Al-Mubârak, “After you have prayed with us you don’t sit with us?” He replied,

“I go and sit with the Sahâbah and the Tâbi’în.”

We said, “And how can you sit with the Sahâbah and Tâbi’în (when they have all passed away)?” He replied,

“I go and read the knowledge I have collected, I find their narrations and deeds. What would I do with you? You sit around backbiting people.” (Al-Dhahabî, Siyar A’lâm Al-Nubalâ` in his biography of ‘Abdullah b. Al-Mubârak)

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Laziness is a sister of failure. Keep yourself busy all the time. Take care of your house, do your duties your work or pray, read Qur’an, read useful books or sit with family and friends and talk to them about things that will bring them closer to Allah. Idleness leads to worries, anxiety, devilish whispers and doubts that nothing can relieve except hard work. 

Never look at the past because it makes your future not worth anything, try to move on as you go on. Try to keep your emotions in control whenever you see something that makes your future feel meaningless. Give minimum quality to problems and forget them as you move on with your life. This will make you happier and stronger and make your dreams come true faster inshaa' Allah.

Give thanks to Allah for His blessings and do not waste your time with that which is not pleasing to Him. Seek out that which is beneficial and useful, such as Islamic magazines, beneficial books and articles that will benefit you both in this world and the Hereafter. Call others to the path of Allah with kind words, good exhortation, wisdom, by means of your good behaviour and by setting a good example. Always make the following du'a and ask Allah to protect you from laziness:

“Allahumma inni a’udhu bika min al-hammi wal-hazan wa a’udhu bika min al-‘ajzi wal-kasal wa a’udhu bika min al-bukhli wal-jubn wa a’udhu bika min ghalbat ad-dayn wa qahr ar-rijal"

(O Allah, I seek refuge with You from distress and grief, and I seek refuge with You from incapacity and laziness and grief, and I seek refuge with You from miserliness and cowardice, and I seek refuge in You from the burden of debt and from being over powered by men).

I ask Allaah to guide us to that which He loves and which pleases Him.

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Category: Enthusiasm and Zeal

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It is reported that Wahb b. Munabbih - Allâh have mercy on him - said:

A scholar once asked another greater than him in knowledge,

"How much should I build?" He replied,

"As much as shelters you from the sun and the rain."

He asked, "How much food should I eat?" He replied, "

More than what keeps you hungry and less than what makes you full."

He asked, "How much should I wear?" He replied,

"As the Messiah (Jesus) did."

He asked, "How much should I laugh?" He replied,

"As much as appears on your face but does not make audible your voice."

He asked, "How much should I cry?" He replied,

"Never tire from crying out of the fear of Allâh."

He asked, "How much should I hide my deeds?" He replied,

"Until people think you had not done a good deed."

He asked, "How much should I make public my deeds?" He replied,

"As much as will let the keen follow your example but not have the people talk about you."

Wahb said.

"Everything has two ends and a middle. If you grab one end, the other will slant, but if you take the middle, both ends will balance. Stick to the balanced middle in all affairs."

Source: Abû Nu'aym, Hilyatu Al-Awliyâ` 4:45.

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Category: Enthusiasm and Zeal

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The history of Islam abounds in scores of such gallant actions on the part of Muslim women, although, unfortunately, they are not commonly known.

Prior to Islam, the Arab women used to accompany men to the battlefield. With their children, they remained behind the fighting lines and looked after the wounded soldiers, attended the horses, comforted their valiant husbands, roused their spirit by narrating the thrilling achievements of their ancestors, disarmed the dead soldiers of the enemy, rallied the panic-stricken fugitives, and guarded the prisoners.

The famous poet of Arabia, 'Umar Bin Kulthum, recites in pride,

Islam also maintained this tradition; Women always followed men in the Jihaad. In the battle of Uhud, according to Bukhaari, 'Aa'ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) carried a leather bag full of water to quench the thirst of wounded soldiers. She was helped in the task by Umm Salim and Umm Salit.

The traditionist Abu Nayeem relates that in the battle of Khaibar, half a dozen women of Madinah followed the marching army. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) did not know of this and, when he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was informed, he angrily asked them why they had come at all. They reverently answered that they had medicines with them, that they would nurse and dress the wounded, take out arrows from the bodies of the soldiers, and arrange for their rations. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) allowed them to accompany the army, and, when Khaybar was conquered, he gave a share of the war booty to these women also.[1]

In a number of battles, Umm Salim and a few other ladies of the Ansar rendered similar service.[2] Rabee', daughter of Mu'aadh, along with other women, performed the duty of carrying the martyrs and the wounded from the battlefield of Uhud to Madinah.[3] Umm Raqida had a pavilion for the wounded, where she washed and dressed their wounds.[4]

Umm Zaid, Ashjiya, and five other ladies helped the Muslims during the battle of Khaybar, by working at spinning wheels. They also picked up arrows from the field, and offered grain flour to the soldiers.[5] Umm Attiya cooked for the Companions in seven battles.[6]

Tabari writes of one occasion when the corpses of the Muslim soldiers lay in great numbers in the van. The group of men appointed for burying the martyrs commissioned women to look after the wounded. In the battles of Aghwath and Armath, women and children dug graves.[7]

The battle of Qadisiya is described thus by a woman who were present,

"When the battle was over, we (women) rushed forward daringly to the battlefield with rods in our hands and picked up the wounded Muslim soldiers."[8]

The above incidents, however, not only testify to the religious zeal, national enthusiasm, and heroism of Muslim women, but also detail the various duties they were called upon to perform from time to time. They did not shirk the humble and unpleasant chores: the digging of graves and the procurement of rations for the army. Not only did the women nurse the wounded in the rear, they also brought in the casualties from the battlefield. Not content with urging men to take a firm stand, sometimes, they actually helped them by joining in the battle. In short, no task was too difficult or too unpleasant for them to attempt.

If you examine the battles of the early period of Islamic history, you will find women engaged in these duties in the rear. The last mentioned services rendered by Muslim women require, however, some elaboration, and we will go into detail to show how nobly the respected women among the Muslims discharged this task.

The mother of Anas b. Malik (Allah be pleased with him), the Prophet's (peace and Blessings of Allah be upon him) servant, Umm Saleem, usually accompanied the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) to the field. When Taleeb b. 'Umair adopted Islam and informed his mother of this, she said,

"You have sided with the man who deserved the most. Would that I had the strength and the ability of man, I would protect him and fight for him."[10]

In the battle of the Ditch, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and his Companions (Allah be pleased with them all) were fighting against the Jews. When Banu Qurayza advanced towards the place where Muslim women and children had entrenched themselves, there were no soldiers to protect these women against them. Meanwhile, a Jew chanced to appear near them. It was feared that the Jew might betray them to Banu Quraiza who would then attack at the earliest opportunity. Safiyyah, the aunt of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), and the mother of Zubayr, asked Hassaan b. Thabit to kill the Jew. Seeing his hesitation, Safiyyah herself climbed down with a pole of the pavilion in her hand and killed the Jew with it. This was the first heroic action, says the historian Ibn Atheer, done by a Muslim woman.[11]

_________________

Footnotes:

[1] Abu Dawud, Fath-e-Khaibar.
[2] Abu Dawud, Vol. 1, p. 252
[3] Bukhari, Kitab-ut-Tib.
[4] Abu Dawud, Vol. I p. 270.
[5] Sahih Muslim, Vol. 11, p. 105 (Egypt)
[6] Tabari Vol VI, p. 2317 (European Edn.).
[7] Tabari, Vol. V, p. 2363.
[8] Ibid.
[9] Usud-ul-Chabs, Vol. V. p. 591.
[10] Isti'ab Taleeb, b.'Umair.
[11] Usud-ul-Ghabn, description of Safia, Vol. V. p. 591

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Category: Enthusiasm and Zeal

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For one to feel alienation is not necessarily a bad sign, infact it could well be a good sign for you! The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “Islam began as something strange and will revert to being something strange, so glad tidings to the strangers.” (Narrated by Muslim (145).)

The word tooba (translated here as, “glad tidings”) has many meanings, such as:

• Goodness and honour;
• A great tree in Paradise;
• Joy and happiness;
• And many other meanings, all of which may apply here.

As-Sindi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said,

'“Strange” because its followers are small in numbers. The basic meaning of ghareeb (stranger) is one who is far from his home.

“And will revert to being something strange” means that few will adhere to it and help others to do so, even if the Muslims are many.

“to the strangers” means those who follow its commands.

“Tooba” is derived from the word tayyib (good), and it is interpreted as referring to Paradise or to a great tree that grows there.

This indicates that supporting Islam and obeying its commands may require the one who does so to leave his homeland and be patient in bearing the hardships of being away from his homeland, as was the case when it (the Islamic Da'wah) first began.' (Sharh Sunan Ibn Majaah [hadeeth no 3986.])

We have the best example in the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). He brought light to his people, but they insisted on remaining in the darkness of kufr (disbelief) and ignorance. They accused him of being a sorcerer, soothsayer or madman, but he was patient in calling them, and he did not get fed up of repeating his call, using different methods of calling individuals and groups, calling in secret and in the open, until he attained great success. Similarly, those daa'iyyahs (women who call others to Islaan) who came after him called the non-Muslims to Islam, and called sinners to obedience, and called innovators to the Sunnah. Many of them experienced hardship, distress and difficulties, but that did not stop them from persisting in da’wah.

Think about these examples, and do what they did, and be patient as they were patient, so that you may attain the pleasure of Allaah. What you hear of mockery was also done by those who came before them, and the fools still repeat it with regard to those who promote the Sunnah, but that does not harm them or make them stop conveying the religion of Allaah.

In addition to being patient in calling people, we advise you to select wise people among other women and relatives to convey the religion of Allaah, those who may not listen to you. So that you can remind them of the truths of Islaam, for if people are happy to belong to Islaam, that does not prevent them from following the Sunnah, but there may be other obstacles that are preventing them from coming to the path of truth, such as misguided scholars and proponents of bid'ah (innovation), or specious arguments and whims and desires, and so on. It may also be due to the fact that we are failing to convey the truth of Islam to them, or we do not have wise ways of conveying it.

We must be gentle and patient, and select the people, and address them politely. Use different means such as audio tapes, video lectures and books, and you may see some good results.

Strive to make your house the focal point of this da’wah. Start with your husband and children, so that this will become a house of blessing for all people. Remember that our mother Khadeejah bint Khuwaylid was the first one of this Ummah to become Muslim, and she was the first one to support the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) in conveying the message and calling her daughters to Islam. Her house was the first house to become Muslim, and from it the call of goodness spread to all corners of the earth, so be like her and follow her example.

And Allaah is the Source of strength.